Abandonment

The most pivotal event in returning my gift to me was a situation that was to change me forever. I was 19 years old, and my alcoholism had progressed along with my self-centeredness–I was frozen in immaturity. I was managing my cross-dressing behavior by taking female hormones pills and drinking to temper their effects. By this time, I was also using street drugs on top of everything else. I was screaming inside for help, but none came.

After taking an overdose the day before final exams as a pre-law freshman in college, I went to summer school to make up for the year I’d sabotaged. I was depressed and didn’t know what to do: My intuition was blocked and muffled by all the poison I was taking into my body and my destructiveness made it impossible to hear the warnings of my soul.

My friends on campus cautioned me to stay away from a particular bar in a seedy part of town that was rumored to attract a wilder kind of crowd. Of course, that just intrigued me more, so I went there with a friend and started hanging around. Needless to say, as a young, rebellious, curious, and self-destructive transgender gal who was desperate for attention and not very experienced with men, literally I got into trouble. The place was frequented by all kinds of rough guys-drug dealers, gangster pimps, and bikers among them. I should have known better, but I’d never been exposed to this element of society before, except in the form of romanticized novels and movies.

My first taste of the dangers of that scene came one night I insulted one of the men in front of his gang of friends. For the first time in my life, I received a violent beating at the hands of a man. His first hit my face full-on, and I flew backward over a chair and landed on the floor. I heard a crack and a hollow thud, and I must have passed out for a few seconds.

I remember picking myself up off the floor…the room was spinning. I could taste the blood running into my mouth, and both the front and back of my head were pounding. I’d never been hit before – I was shocked, humiliated, and very scared. No one helped me up from the floor. I’d apparently done the unthinkable, although I wasn’t exactly sure what that was… However, it was what happened two weeks later that would change my life forever.

I was beginning to feel cooped up in my school’s dorm, where I’d remained since the incident at the bar. Still shocked by my experience, and with the bruise still evident on my face, I let my girlfriend convince me to go downtown for a beer. Later that evening we ran into a group of guys we’d seen around. I was ready to go home, but my friend wanted to stay longer, so I accepted a lift from the men. I didn’t know them very well, but they seemed nice, and they’d never bothered me before.

After what had occurred two weeks earlier, I was looking for protection, so I believed them when they offered to get me home safely. Little did I know that these men had other plans for me – an experience that showed me what it was like to lose power to choose what would happen to my own body, as well as making me truly understand the nature of shame. But the situation would also open the door to those abilities that I had previously pushed away.

The interesting thing was that the minute I accepted the ride, I knew something terrible was going to happen, but I just wasn’t able to listen. My intuition was there to show me the way, but I was drunk and couldn’t hear it. Although a sense of fearful expectation made my heart race, I hoped that what I anticipated was just my imagination…but it turned out to be all too real. Something important was indeed about to take place: I was going to be raped.

As these men violated me, I had an extraordinary and unforgettable experience. I remember it vividly as if it were only yesterday. I saw myself being lifted out of my body, floating up to the corner of the room. I looked down at the scene below, observing what was happening to me in a calm, detached, curious way. I remember feeling very old as if I had been a soul since the beginning of time.

At the same time, my intuitive gift began to reveal scenes to me from the lives of my assailants. I started to feel oddly sorry for them. I saw a child locked in the basement without food and water, left there by his fat, slovenly, alcoholic mother. I witnessed another small and skinny boy being shuffled in and out of foster homes. A third one had pale white skin and red hair and was part of a large family – I heard yelling and screaming in a kitchen, and I saw the father beating the mother to the floor and the little boy seething with rage. Then I saw someone in a grocery store stealing cans of soup and placing them in a big, unfamiliar purse.

These images swirled around me and were suspended in the room. I also experienced a split awareness: I was conscious of myself, and at the same time, I was able to “walk” beside my own mind, jumping back and forth at will. Later in life, I recognized that this is exactly the same “location” that I’m able to visit when I read for people.

What happened to me that night left me with two distinct legacies: The first was the shameful wound of rape that took many years to heal; the second and more important one was the dual awareness that I experienced. From that day forward, I was able to access this awareness at will, and it ultimately became the key to my hunger to know and understand the vastness of human consciousness and perception. But this change for the better wasn’t immediate.

Shame and Silence

For the next few years, I remained in situations that placed me in harm’s way. I was confused, and I prayed to God but believed He would ignore me. And my mother made me promise never to tell anyone about my experience, as she herself was a gang rape survivor. (During the war, she’d been assaulted by a group of Japanese soldiers while her father was forced to watch.)

I’d never wanted anyone to know about the rape. I kept it to myself until I collapsed a month later, hemorrhaging, with a super-high temperature. It took nine more years for me to hit bottom. The alcohol and drugs no longer provided escapes from my intuitive abilities, although messages and visions were distorted and filtered through my damaged ego. I wore the perception of myself as a victim like a badge.

My intuitive gift became increasingly difficult to suppress, so I stopped trying. With twenty-twenty hindsight, of course, I see that I had a strong six-sensory perspective on the people around me, what they were going through, and what was about to happen. But because I was never sober, I was unable to put this to good use.

I Offered The Pizza Boy A Small Part Of My Experience.

Right then I realized I hadn’t cum since that night. Not for lack of trying, but because it was hard for me to orgasm without a dick inside of me.

A thought popped into my head. I could try to cum right now. I am alone—but, no, it is too risky. The thought of cumming in my room started to turn me on. Despite the concern, my hands pulled at the straps of my romper. I slunk into my blanket a little more, slowly pulling down the romper until it fell around my ankles.

I might get caught, I thought, pushing down my panties and untucking my limp tranny cock. I started to stroke it under my sheets, my gaze constantly looking around the empty room. I pulled my knees up to rest against my pillow, fingering my ass while tugging on my cock.

The thrill of potentially getting caught made me hard. I stroked faster and faster, feeling for the climax I wanted so badly. I was so close—and then I lost it, and my cock went soft. I licked up what precum clung to my fingers, then begrudgingly redressed.

For the next hour, I let boredom take me, eventually ending up watching cheesy porn videos for the terrible acting and humorous sex. The one I was currently watching was of a pizza delivery boy that was offered a handjob as a tip. While mildly sexy, I found myself more hungry than horny.

“I could go for a pizza,” I whispered. I opened an app on my phone, and within minutes one was on its way.

My attention was pulled by the soft tapping of a delivery boy at the outside of the glass. I shook myself, quickly pushing out of my kitchen table and unlocking the glass door. “Sorry—I got a little distracted.”

“I am guessing you are WendyBella?”

“Yup! What gave it away?”

The delivery boy smiled and looked around the empty house. “Lucky guess.” There was something about him that seemed familiar, but I couldn’t quite put a finger on it. He lifted the receipt. “It says you wanted to pay in cash?”

“Yeah, one second,” I said, rushing over to my purse. I reached into the pocket where my wallet was supposed to be, finding nothing but an empty space. “Uh oh.”

“Something wrong?” the delivery boy asked.

I huffed. “I grabbed the wrong purse—I don’t have my wallet, I am sorry, this is awkward.” I blushed brightly. I looked around the room for an answer I knew I wouldn’t find.

The delivery boy scratched at an eyebrow. “WendyBella,” he said as if remember my name from somewhere, then snapped his fingers. “Your Nicole’s best friend!”

“Yeah—I, do we know each other?”

“No. Well sort of. You know my neighbor, he is dating Nicole,” he said.

“Your Bron’s neighbor?” I asked, instantly recognizing the similarity. “I thought you looked familiar.” My memory flashed with the image of Bron’s cock, and I blushed. Bron wouldn’t have told him about that though. Right?

“About your pizza though,” he continued, “if you can remember your card number—I could probably type it in?”

“I don’t remember it,” I said sheepishly. I hopelessly looked through my purse. A pack of gum, some tissues, an old condom, mascara, and lip gloss were all that I had. I tossed my purse on the desk and looked at my phone. “Unless you accept handjobs as payment, then I think I am out of luck,” I jested.

He flushed and his eyes went wide.

“Sorry, bad joke!” I said quickly. “There was this video—I mean I was reminded of something—that was poor taste, sorry.”

“You’ve been around Nicole too long,” he joked back. He looked around briefly, then spoke softer. “I, um,” he whispered, “I would—accept a handjob.”

I laughed and waved a hand, thinking he was joking. “Seriously?” I asked coyly.

“If you’re serious,” he said nervously and grinned.

I bit my lip as I thought, considering it. I could probably call Nicole and get her to cover for the pizza, then pay her back later. I looked at Bron’s neighbor, and curiosity got the better of me.

“Alright,” I whispered. “But only because I am starving. And on one condition. You have to promise not to tell Bron. Or Nicole. It has to stay between us.”

“I promise,” he agreed, setting down the pizza box on the floor. He shifted awkwardly, uncertain what to do. “Should I—um—sit down? Stand?”

“Have you ever—had a handjob before?” I asked.

“Sort of.”

“Sort of?”

“On the outside of my pants once,” he said with a shrug.

“Wait. So this is going to be your—first handjob?”

He nodded wordlessly, trying to casually cover a growing bulge in his jeans.

I could feel my cheeks red from the blush. “Here,” I said, pulling his arm. “Just sit on my bed.”

He sat down, looking from side to side. I kicked off my stockings and knelt down, pushing open his knees and gently tracing my hand up his thigh. “Don’t worry, I will do most of the work,” I said. The tips of my fingers pressed against his cock. “All you have to do is relax and let me know if you hear anyone knocking on the door.” I gripped half of his cock. “And play with my nipples every so often, if you don’t mind.”

I reached up and slowly unfastened his belt, intentionally exaggerating the moments while I undid the button first and then the zipper. I reached inside his boxers. He has a nice cock, I thought. I pulled the pants at the hips, dragging them and his boxers down to his knees.

His cock bounced out of his pants. He nervously covered himself and laughed. I grabbed his hands and pushed them to the side. “Relax,” I whispered, holding his cock with one hand, the other on his thigh. He wasn’t as thick as Bron, but just as long, and with a slight curve. “If you want me to stop—”

“No,” he replied instantly. “I—am just nervous.”

“Would it help if I talked?” I asked, running my fingers up and down his shaft. I grabbed his cock with both hands, holding the tip close enough to my mouth so that he could feel the heat of my whispers. “Do you like it when I stroke the tip like this?”

I put the tip of his cock in my palms, stroking and twisting in a way that focused only on the tip. He moaned ever so gently. “Yes,” he whispered. I kept doing it, cradling his balls with my other hand. A dribble of precum dripped onto my hand.

“And what about when I do this?” I spread the precum along his shaft, slowly stroking from tip to base.

He moaned again. I noticed when he relaxed his legs, sitting back in my chair. I held his cock close, looking up at him, holding the tip against my bottom lip. I let a little bit of spit spill over my lips and onto his cock.

It was slicker now with my spit, and I was able to move my hands up and down his shaft rapidly. I tried to figure out what he liked based on his moans. When I grabbed his balls. When I gripped him with both hands. When I focused on just the tip.

He closed his eyes. I know that look, I thought. “Are you going to cum?”

I kept stroking as he moaned, waiting for him to cum. But he didn’t. “Are you—holding back?” I asked.

“A little—” he confessed.

“Why?”

“It feels good.”

I giggled and kept stroking. “It would feel better if you cum,” I whispered. “I want to feel it, warm and gooey, dripping over my fingers.” He moaned and I felt the faintest pulse in his cock.

I have him close. Just a little more. I wonder if he can hold back if I do this—

I held his cock against my bottom lip again, looking up at him. When he looked at me, I parted my lips and took him in my mouth. It was just the tip at first, keeping my eyes locked on his as I swirled my tongue, tasting his precum.

And then I took him deeper in my mouth. Slowly working up and down. Pushing his cock past my tongue and down my throat. I gagged, pulling off with a gasp, and his cock slick from my throat. I licked along his shaft, blowing him harder and harder.

But still, he didn’t cum. I kept sucking for what felt like fifteen minutes. After deepthroating him again, I stopped for air. “Are you still holding back?” I said between breaths.

“It feels really good,” he replied.

“Was I at least close to making you cum?”

“A lot of times.”

“Alright,” I said, reaching for my purse. “Let’s see if you can hold back this time.” I grabbed the old condom, tore open the package, and slid it over his cock.

“What are you doing?” he asked as I stood. I pushed at the shoulder straps of my romper, letting it fall to the ground.

“Stand up,” I whispered. Then I turned around and dropped my panties to the floor, leaning over my bed with my ass toward him. I reached behind as he stood, grabbing his cock, and leading it to my asshole.

“I’ve—never been with a transgirl,” he said.

“Well, there are really only two things you need to know about transgirls,” I said as I pushed his cock into my tight asshole. I moaned. “They have tight assholes, and know how to please a cock.”

I was glad when he pushed in slowly. It was so tight but it felt so good to feel him inside of me. He grabbed my hips, spreading my ass cheeks and watching as his cock disappeared in my ass. I guided him with my hand, pushing and pulling as he thrust.

My tranny cock started to get hard against my blanket as he pounded me from behind. I gripped the edge of the desk, pressing against each thrust as he fucked my asshole. My limp cock quivered, then pulsed as he made me cum. I moaned so loud I was afraid someone from another house might hear us. I felt my stomach slick with my own cum as he thrust faster, and faster.

And then he slowed, pushing his cock deep inside of me. And then I felt it.

There it is, I thought blissfully, savoring every pulse from his cock. I could feel his cum, a lot of cum, warm in my ass. I opened my eyes. Wait.

As he pulled his cock out with a thwap, I felt a bit of cum dripping along my thigh. I looked down at the condom, broken and scrunched against the base of his cock. He stumbled backward into the bed, breathing heavily, and looking from my ass to the broken condom.

“I—I didn’t mean to break it—sorry,” he said.

“It was mostly just to lube my asshole anyway,” I said. I pushed his legs wider, spreading my ass over his cock. I felt the warmth dripping out of my gaping hole and onto his cock. I watched him with a grin as he watched the cum spill out.

I’ve never had so much cum in my asshole before. I turned, then got on my knees again. I let the cum drip into my mouth from his cock, sucking up the rest, and letting him watch as I swirled it around with my tongue. I sucked what was left out of his cock, giving him one last glance before I swallowed the load.

He sighed happily. “Wow—I, don’t know what to say.”

“Did you enjoy it?” I asked, sliding into my panties, and pulling up the romper.

“You have no idea,” he said, standing and zipping up his pants.

“That makes me happy,” I said. My stomach growled, unsatisfied with just the cum. I opened the pizza box and got a slice.

“You—um,” he said, pointing to the corner of my mouth, “you have a little—something.”

I brushed my cheek where a bit of cum still clung. “Thanks,” I said, then took a bite of the slice. The pizza had never tasted so good.

“I am so late now for work,” he said.

“Sorry about that. Next time I won’t forget my wallet.”

He made himself presentable, turning to leave but stopping at the door. “Do you mind if I get your number?” he asked sheepishly.

He fucks me so hard I am left gaping and dripping with cum—and still is nervous to ask for my number? “You’re cute,” I said, “and yes.” I wrote down my number on a piece of paper, tore it off, and handed it to him. “Not exactly what I would have expected for a first date. But fun!”

He smiled, awkwardly kissed my cheek, then scurried out of the house.

I sat in my chair, cringing against the pain of my stretched asshole. It felt good. I leaned back with complete satisfaction. I could still taste his cum in my mouth, and my lips were still sticky. I looked at the cum stain on my bedsheet and sighed. Totally worth the mess.

 PayPal.Me/TerryTSwendybella.

Wounds home alone

My name is Terry WendyBella and I am 41 years old as of the year 2022. I’d been relatively celibate for a while, my last few years posing as a cross-dresser stunted by the knowledge that whatever sex appeal I could generate was really just false advertising. When I started my transition I became suddenly aware of the new sexual economy afforded to me: The world is full of hot straight guys who want to get fucked by chicks with dicks.

Topping isn’t really my thing, but I had a narrow window of opportunity to enjoy being a commodity fetish and wanted to make the most of it. Feeling sexy and desired just by being honest about myself was really gratifying, especially after hating my body for so many years. There weren’t a lot of dating options available to me at the time.

I have been living with a history of bilateral lower limb chronic venous insufficiency with recurrent venous stasis ulcers for almost all of my adult life. At the age of 20, I suffered an ulcer at the dorsum of my left foot which is limiting my function in walking. I was left with throbbing and aching on my left foot, needing daily dressing and pain killers on a daily basis. I was also left with silvery, paper-thin skin on my right ankle.

A few years later, I had a simple knock to the same area on my foot — and that became the ulcer that has been the bane of my life ever since. It was just a tiny cut on top of my left foot that refused to heal and for several weeks, I tried to carry on as normal (albeit with smelly exudate running into my shoe). After a few more weeks, I was sent to the hospital to have it dressed. I hadn’t even heard of leg ulcers and had no concept of the effect that such a small wound could have on a person’s life. The ulcer healed after 12 weeks which, at the time, seemed like a lifetime — what I would pay now for a 12-week healing time! However, I was left with an even worse throbbing venous pain in my left foot and very thin, and delicate skin on my right ankle.

I, unfortunately, suffered a second knock to the same ankle in the same place. The wound became infected and very quickly went from the size of a small dot to the size of a 50-cent coin and I received IV antibiotics in the hospital for several days. After that, I required daily dressing to my wound. Nevertheless, the ulcer did not heal. It closed over for a matter of weeks a few times, but never permanently. In all honesty, living with a chronic wound, you need a lot of comforts.

LOW SELF ESTEEM
Living with a chronic wound has affected my life in every single way. First and foremost, it has affected my confidence. People wear nice clothes or shoes to feel good about themselves — I cannot do that. I cannot wear shorts, cropped trousers, skirts, or dresses without my leg and my highly unattractive compression stockings being on the show. It makes me feel old and ugly.

Compression

To improve vein circulation in your legs and treat swelling, your nurse will apply a firm compression bandage over the affected leg. These bandages are designed to squeeze your legs and encourage blood to flow upwards towards your heart. There are many different types of bandages or elastic stockings used to treat venous leg ulcers, which may be made in 2, 3, or 4 different layers.

My foot and toes have actually changed shape because of the ulcer. I have spent so many years walking on the side of my foot that the ligaments have shortened and I find it hard to straighten my foot. This results in my left shoe being worn down more quickly and extra pressure being put on my left knee and hip.

I have spent many days walking in agony around theme parks, museums, parks, and shopping centers. The pain relief medication also has an effect on me. Thankfully, I am on a much lower dose now but I still take oral paracetamol and tramadol (Formula: C₁₆H₂₅NO₂) four times a day. When my pain was at its worst, I could barely walk. I wasn’t sleeping very well at this time and I spent many a night lying awake in pain (especially after a painful dressing change). Sleep deprivation affects you in every single area of your life but mainly your concentration, emotions, and diet. I was taking way over the prescribed amount of painkillers just to try and take the edge off. I have tried all different ways of keeping the ulcer dry but nothing has ever worked.

I cannot cope with the pain of being on my feet all day as I am working as wait staff in a fast pace western restaurant. It would be much harder if I didn’t have health professionals looking out for me. My account of my ulcer is very emotional and I cry a lot: tears of frustration that the ulcer won’t heal, tears of self-pity when people are sympathetic and, most of all, tears of sadness for the things that have been taken away
from me. I know there are people much worse off than me and whenever I am feeling down, I always remind myself of that. I know I am lucky to have wonderful family and friends that love and care for me and of course, I am grateful that I haven’t got any awful diseases that are life-threatening.

I agreed to tell my story because it is less common to suffer from a chronic leg ulcer at my age. It is important to understand that people in their 20s and 30s need to be treated differently than elderly patients so that the impact these have on their lives can be minimized.

https://trello.com/b/BUAdSetL/in-depth-activity

Sexual Desires That Stimulate Me

I couldn’t get enough of him. I was tired and sore but I didn’t care. I didn’t want to sleep. I wanted the ache. I wanted him in me, all the time. His weight is on top of me. I wanted to squeeze him in further and further. I wanted to watch his face. I wanted his sweat to drop onto me. I wanted to drop mine on him. I got on top of him. I’d never done it before. I couldn’t really believe it; I was doing this. I was inventing something. I held him and put him in. He felt deeper in me. I’ll never forget it. I was in charge and he liked it. I held his hands down. He pretended he was trying to break free. I let my tits touch his face. He went mad; he bucked. He split me in two. I pushed down. I couldn’t believe it. One of his fingers flicked over my bum. I did it to him. He lifted and heaved. I couldn’t believe it. There was no end to it, no end to the new things. He did something. I copied him. I did something. He did it back. He took me from behind. I pushed back and forced more of him into me. I sucked him. He licked me. I made him come on my stomach. He sucked my toes. 

https://trello.com/b/dTTm6NnH/dreamwork

A Blow Job From Me Is Not A Favor For You

My neighbor stood outside his door, the one across from mine, fumbling at his backpack. He turned when he heard me. “Sorry,” he said.

“If it weren’t for these damned bags,” I said in kind, “I might have been offended.” He smiled, then turned frustrated at his pack. I reached a hand for my keys, coming shortly.

“Do you need a hand with those bags?” he asked, extending an arm toward the bags. I noticed the arm that wasn’t outstretched was slung across his chest in a sling.

“And break your other arm?” I jested, then tried to point with my chin. “If you could hand me my keys though—”

He nodded with a clear confusion, not seeing a pocket on my pants, and pointing at my purse. “In your purse?”

“Um—” I grinned, “actually on the edge of my waistband.” I tried to lean forward to pull my shirt up, but it wasn’t enough. “They are just on my hip if you don’t mind—um—reaching beneath my shirt and pulling

waistband. The woes of yoga pants.”

That made him laugh, grabbing the keys as carefully as he could. “Is it—this one?” he asked, selecting a key. When I nodded, he unlocked my apartment and pushed open the door slightly, then set the keys in one of the grocery bags.

“Thanks!” I said pushing the door open with my shoe and setting down the bags. “I don’t think we have actually met?”

“I’m Rob,” he said, holding out his hand.

“Steph,” I said, shaking his hand gently so as not to hurt his arm. “Is that recent?”

“Sprained it yesterday,” he said, shifting slowly in the sling. “Still getting used to it.”

“Well thanks again for the door,” I said.

“No problem,” he replied, then turned away.

When I closed the door, I stayed a moment longer, watching as he dug through his pack. He fumbled at his phone, then crouched along the edge of the door. It was clear he lost his keys, and I felt bad just letting him sit there in the cold.

I opened my door. “Hey,” I said. “Lose your keys?”

“Left them at my girlfriend’s house,” he sighed, looking at his phone. “And—she isn’t replying.”

Girlfriend, I thought. “Do you want to come in? So you don’t have to wait out here?”

His eyes drifted from me to the apartment, back to his phone, then back at me. “You sure you don’t mind?”

“Not at all! It’s freezing out here. Plus, you’ll owe me one,” I jested, holding open the door.

He stood at the threshold, patiently waiting for me to give him some type of direction.

“Make yourself comfortable,” I said, picking up the grocery bags and taking them to the kitchen. “Sit on the couch, at the table, on the floor, wherever.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t worry about it. You hungry?”

“I wouldn’t dare impose—” he began.

“A bit to eat isn’t imposing,” I interrupted him. “Besides, I was just going to put together a grilled chicken salad. I always overdo it anyways, so you can help me not have extras?”

“You’re too nice,” he said.

I shivered as I put away a can of orange juice in the freezer. “It is actually kind of selfish of me if you think about it,” I jested. When I turned around, I caught him glancing at my chest. My shirt had gotten wetter than I had thought, tight around my breasts. Oh no, I thought, noting the distinctly pointed nipples at the tips of my budding breasts. I probably should have put a bra on before going out.

Rob looked at his phone before looking up. “Is there anything I can do at least to help?”

“Relax a bit,” I said, waving to a chair, “I’ll let you figure out your key problem first.” After I put the rest of the groceries away I changed into a dry shirt before starting dinner. Rob sat patiently, huffing to himself every so often.

My phone started to vibrate on the counter halfway through cutting up the raw chicken. Kayla’s calling. “Do you mind if I take this?” I asked.

“Not at all,” Rob insisted.

I answered the call with the side of my finger, pushing the speaker button as I was unable to hold my phone to my ear. “Hey Kayla,” I said casually.

“So—,” she began excitedly, “why is it that Bron’s younger brother has a distinct impression that you sucked his cock when he delivered a pizza—”

“Ahh—” I interrupted, my cheeks flushing red. “Right now isn’t the best time to talk about that—”

“So you did swallow his cock?” Kayla gasped. “To his credit, he was hesitant to tell me, and a little giddy. And here I am shocked—shocked that you didn’t tell me!”

“Can I call you back later?” I asked panicked. “I currently have a guest and you are on the speaker,” I whispered.

“Oh—who is it?” she asked in a loud whisper.

“The guy from across the hall, Rob,”

“Oh the one that you said was wildly attractive—” started Kayla.

“Ah!” I yelped, frantically ending the call before she could say anything else that would embarrass me further. Not that she could. In my periphery, Rob was silently on his phone, scrolling back and forth as if he hadn’t been listening.

I coughed a little bit, thinking of what to say. I decided to turn on some music when I couldn’t find the words. I finished preparing the rest of the meal in silence, which was pretty fast, then sat down across from Rob.

“That looks great,” he said as I set down the plate for him. “Thank you again, for letting me hangout here. And feeding me.”

“Don’t thank me until you have tried it,” as I stabbed a piece of chicken with my fork. “Any luck with your keys?”

“Not yet.” He fiddled with his fork. “But even so, my girlfriend lives an hour and a half away. And if the keys are in her car, or she isn’t home, I don’t know—” He looked at me. “Sorry, don’t mean to complain.”

I looked out the window at the growing night. It was already getting late, and the rainstorm as strong as it had been since it started. “I’d be complaining more than you. I am sure she will answer soon enough.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, then grinned. “So is it true what your friend said?”

My cheeks burned bright red. “Well—sort of—but it was only because I was super hungry, and I grabbed the wrong purse and so I didn’t have my card—and well I kind of had a thing with his older brother—”

“No, about finding my wildly attractive?” he laughed.

I buried my face in my hands. “Oh! Um. Well, that is a bit forward of you!”

“Says the girl who just confessed to seducing the—pizza boy?”

“I regret that you heard that part,” I smiled.

“Well I think you’re cute,” he said, “and very kind.”

“It’s really no problem,” I said. Did he just flirt with me?

We talked casually until we had both finished eating, then I told him to just relax on the couch while I cleaned up what few dishes there were. It was getting late by the time I put the last dish away, going to my bedroom to change into comfier clothes; some calf-high socks, spandex shorts, and an oversized shirt that could have been a short dress.

“Any luck?” I asked, pulling my hair into a ponytail as I came into the living room.

“Not yet,” he said, “but if I have overstayed my welcome, please, don’t hesitate to tell me.”

“I was going to say you can crash here tonight if you need,” I said. I pulled a few blankets from a nearby basket, putting them on the corner of the couch. “I would feel terrible about sending you out in the rain, anyways.”

“I really appreciate it. How can I repay you?”

“Pretend you never heard that conversation earlier,” I grinned, “and I’ll consider us even.”

“Deal.”

I took a wrong step, slipping on the edge of my sock, and slightly twisting my ankle. I yelped.

“You alright?” Rob asked.

“Yeah, just my ankle. I stepped on it wrong when I went out for a run. Flexes weird every so often.”

“I could look at it if you want?”

“My ankle?”

“I am a physical therapist,” he said proudly. “Does it happen often?”

“Randomly, it seems,” I said, sitting on the couch next to him.

He turned his knees toward me. “Here,” he said, patting his thigh. “Ankles are tricky.”

I swallowed unexpectedly. I scooted closer, then put my ankle on his leg. He gently pulled off my sock, setting it aside. My heart started to beat a little quicker. He had such a soft touch as he held my ankle. “Tell me where it gets tense,” he said.

He held my bare foot in his hand, rotating it slowly. “There,” I said possibly a bit too loudly.

Little by little, he massaged my foot. It felt like he was teasing me. I had to fight to control my breathing before it got out of hand. I felt my limp cock pulse in my tuck.

“Stop,” I said abruptly. “Sorry, that feels really good, it is just—a little too good.”

“I don’t understand,” Rob questioned.

“It’s just that—well I have this, thing—I am usually only barefoot when I am engaging in—um—sexual activities,”

“Oh,”

“Its weird, I know, it is just sort of my—turn on.” I slipped my sock back on. “Thank you for checking my ankle, though.”

“I didn’t feet anything concerning. I could give you a stretch or two that could help.”

“Thanks,” I said, flexing my toes in my sock. I got up and went to the kitchen. “I think I am going to have a little wine. Do you want any?”

“I wouldn’t say no,” he said coyly. I poured a couple glasses, putting the blankets between us on the couch. I don’t want to get overly stirred up.

“And it isn’t weird,” he said as I handed him a glass. “Having a foot fetish, that is. Well, a little odd,”

“Well thanks,” I laughed.

“I only mean to say that there are plenty of stranger fetishes. Trust me.”

“Oh?” I asked, suddenly curious. “And what makes you think that?”

It was him that blushed this time. “Forget I said anything,” he teased.

“No, really, tell me. Do you have an odder fetish?” I joked.

“A bit, yes, but that is all I am going to say,” he teased.

“Fine,” I said patting his leg, “know my secrets, but don’t tell me yours.”

He stayed quiet, spinning the glass of wine. I could feel the wine starting to settle in my stomach with a warmth that loosed my tongue, and ignited something inside of me. He smiled at me, then stood to stand at the balcony door. The shades were pulled open, and it was dark enough now that I could see into a few other apartments that did not have their shades closed.

We continued to talk, drinking more wine, and idly watching the storm outside. As the hours passed, slowly we slid closer and closer to one another. Before I knew it we were kissing, me carefully leaning away from his arm, and his hand up my shirt squeezing at my boobs.

I put my hand in his lap, slowly working up his leg.

“Wait,” he said, pulling away.

“Sorry,” I said, “I shouldn’t have—”

“Lay back and put your feet in my lap.”

“What?” I asked.

He carefully grabbed my ankles and I slid back onto the couch, my feet in his lap. My heart pounded as he took off my socks, running his fingers over the arch of my foot, then along my smooth heel. He kissed along my ankle, then ran his tongue along my toes.

I gasped with excitement. It was so simple. Such a small thing. And it felt so good. Slowly he licked along my soles, occasionally sucking on my toes. I sat back, closed my eyes, and enjoyed every moment. After a while, he set my feet down in his lap. I was panting.

“Did you like it?” he asked.

“Like it?” I gulped. “That was incredible.” I spun around and got on my knees at the edge of the couch, wedging between his legs. His eyes went wide and nervously smiled as I started unbuckling his belt. “Now you have to tell me your fetish.”

“I—um—,” he whispered as I undid the button on his pants, though struggled with the zipper. I looked up at him, his pants were half open in front of me. I could see his bulging cock beneath his boxers, just waiting for me to take it out.

“You just did something for me that not a lot of people are into doing,” I whispered. “Let me at least try to repay the favor.”

“I have—um—a fetish—”

“Yes?” I urged. I gripped the waistband of his boxers, feeling his cock with the tips of my fingers. “If you say it, I’ll try it—deal?”

“It is a—swallowing fetish,” he said.

“Like cum swallowing?” I asked.

“Actually—piss swallowing,” he said nervously.

“Oh,” I said, pursing my lips as I thought. “Hmm.” I grabbed his boxers, wiggling them down his legs to reveal his cock. “Let’s try it!”

“Really?” he asked excitedly.

I tossed his pants and boxers to the side, slipping out of my shirt. I leaned on him, grabbing his cock and pressing it against my bare chest. His cock was a little smaller than I expected, able to grip it completely with just one hand. In some ways, I prefer smaller cocks, so I didn’t mind one bit.

I pressed the tip of his cock against my tongue. “Really,” I whispered. I sucked his cock, taking him completely in my mouth. I pushed my tongue out as I took his shaft deeper, running it along the base of his balls. “How do you want to start?”

“I—might need to be standing.”

I edged backward on my knees to give him enough space to stand. I realized that the balcony blinds were still open, and enough lights were on in my apartment that anyone could see in. The thought of someone watching kind of turned me on, so I left them open.

He held his cock in my direction. I got comfortable on my knees, stroking him, and looking up at him. “Do you want me to be blowing you when you start?”

He nodded.

I put his cock in my mouth, gently taking him in and out. I kept my pace slow so that he didn’t get too distracted. His eyes were closed when I looked up at him, and he seemed focused. And then his expression changed, and I felt it.

Piss squirted in the back of my throat and I almost gagged. I kept sucking as my mouth filled. It wasn’t that bad, like a saltier and wetter cum. I tilted my head back and parted my lips so that he could see it filling my mouth. He watched eagerly.

I swallowed the first mouthful, shivering as I felt the warmth of his piss in my stomach. A bit of the stream splashed off my lip, dripping off my chin, and down along my boobs. I reached up and spread the piss along my body.

I kept sucking as he continued to piss, swallowing a second time. I gasped for air, opening my mouth wide and letting him piss from a distance. It sounded like a cup being filled with water. I swallowed again as it spilled over my lips.

I gripped his cock at the base, feeling the stream getting weaker as I held the tip in my mouth. I opened my mouth and showed him, gargling before swallowing the last bit. My cheeks and chest weren’t as wet as I had feared, only a little bit of piss dripping down my body.

He stood there breathing heavily, a hand resting on the top of his head.

“Did you like it?” I asked, lightly burping up piss. “Sorry.”

“That was amazing,” he said. He guided me to the couch, having me kneel on the cushions. With my ass toward him, he pulled at my spandex shorts. He paused when my transgirl cock fell out.

“Is everything alright?” I asked nervously.

He leaned in, spreading my ass with one hand, and started eating my ass. I moaned as his tongue went into my asshole. He pushed a finger in. Then a second. I thought I saw someone in an adjacent apartment but didn’t dare look.

I gasped as he pushed his cock ultimately into my ass in a single thrust. He held onto my hip, pounding me harder and harder into the couch. I could barely breathe, let alone talk. And then he stopped suddenly.

He sifted through his pants pocket, pulling out his phone with wide eyes. He took a few deep breaths to settle himself, then answered with surprising calm.

“Hey Lucila,” he whispered.

The girlfriend, I thought. I crawled off the couch, pulling at his hips and guiding him to sit down. “Yeah I think they are in your car,” he said, half distracted but sitting down. I slid between his legs, laying my head beside his cock, and looked up at him.

“No—luckily a neighbor is letting me hang out,” he said.

I took his cock in my mouth, still looking up at him. He winced with pleasure, and his voice cracked ever so faintly.

“Just the one across the hall,” he said. I pressed his cock down my throat as far as it could go. “No, no, she fell asleep already. I am just sitting on the couch.”

I raised an eyebrow in his direction, letting the spittle from my throat drip from my lips over his cock. He raised a finger in my direction as if that would stop me.

“Mmhmm,” he said on the phone. I swirled my tongue around as I sucked faster. It was clear that he was having trouble focusing. I didn’t stop blowing him, our eyes locked as I gulped down his cock.

I felt his cock give a familiar pulse. He grabbed my ponytail, shoving his cock down my throat. I coughed as he shot cum down my throat, feeling it throbbing in my mouth. He let go and I pulled away with a gasp. Cum was dripping from my lips and down my chin, with a few strands hanging from the tip of his cock to the base of my lips.

“Sorry,” he said quickly, “I had to cough.”

I smiled and shook my head, slurping up the cum.

“Alright,” he said, “that would be great, I’ll wait up for you then. Okay, see you then,” he said, then ended the call.

“She is bringing your keys, then?” I asked, slowly stroking his semi-limp cock.

He rubbed his eyes and sighed, then smiled. “She is bringing my keys.”

“And—you said she lived an hour and a half away?” I asked coyly.

“Yeah?” he replied. “Why?”

“Because I want you to keep cumming in my mouth until your balls are empty,” I whispered. His cock got firmer as I put my lips around it. He leaned back into the couch as I rested my elbows on his knees. I wonder how many more times I can make him cum before she gets here, I thought. I felt his cock pulse, and warm cum spilled onto my tongue. Only one way to find out.

An Old Memory (A Young Sissy’s Initial Orgy)

From cock to cock I went, sucking each but not taking it down my throat. The other two cocks were above average in length but not as thick as Jack’s. So when Jim began to feel he was going to shoot his load, he pulled my head down onto his cock and it slipped down my throat as I gagged and panicked. Jack said, “Don’t breathe, just let it go; he’ll cum right down your throat, boy. Take it, yeah, that’s it!”

I had begun to jerk off as Jim first entered my mouth, so as he shot his load down my throat I gagged and shot my own load. When finished he slowly pulled his cock out until it still rested on my face; his hand still gripped my hair, so he began to smear his cock over my face and my tongue lapped whatever it could reach.

“Enough, already, man,” Mark said as he pulled me closer and jammed his cock in my mouth. “Take this cock, you cock-whore. Yeah, baby, suck it good.”

I began to realize I loved being manhandled and ordered about, and the idea of having a cock in my mouth all the time flashed through my mind. My cock-still as hard as steel-had me stroking it almost immediately. He pulled his cock out of my mouth and ordered me to suck his balls; I did, and he stroked his cock, his hand bouncing off my forehead. “Oh, my God,” he moaned as he jammed his cock back into my mouth and straight down my throat as he shot load after load.

Jack came back from the other side of his desk, put his hand under my chin, and said, “Stand, slut, and now lean over the desk.” I followed his orders. I always had a cock up my ass, but I also had played with myself, using smooth oblong objects which I lubed and inserted in my ass as I jacked off.

Three hands fondled my legs and ass; one found its way into the crack of my ass and I felt a moist pressure on my rectum. A finger slipped in and I almost shot a load; then another finger joined him, and the pressure I felt took the wind out of me. Another hand pulled my cock and balls back up through my legs, then the fingers were pulled out and I felt someone’s mouth licking and sucking at my sphincter. The sensation was beyond anything I had ever felt and my cock exploded in the hands holding it. I heard a mixture of pleasing moaning-pleasure and giggling as the tongue entered my asshole and the face was jammed against my body. I could feel another hand scoop up the cum from my cock and it was presented to my mouth, and I licked the hand clean of cum. My mouth ached for more cock, more cum, and my asshole became the center of my universe; it spasm-ed and opened to accommodate more than just tongue, lusting after cock, my whole body was aflame with a youthful power and all-consuming lust.

Someone ate my ass for what seemed forever, and each moment brought pleasure as I never felt before. Unlike all my past experiences, I felt I could cum again and again-still rock hard and eager for the next step; and finally, it came. A smearing cool sensation enveloped my entire ass crack, a finger then two entered my asshole and brought the cool sensation with it. What felt like Jack’s cock was resting in the crack of my ass, at first; then, the head began to slide up and down the slippery crack until it rested against my asshole. Jack leaned over and whispered into my ear, “Baby, this is goin’ hurt for just a moment or two; I’m goin’ take it real easy until you adjust, so don’t panic. Trust me.”

As Jack pressed his head against my asshole, Mark and Jim held my arms and shoulders. It pressed in and the pain shot through me like a knife; I tried to resist but they held me fast. “Just wait, baby, it’ll be all right,” Jack whispered in my ear.

And he was right. The pain slowly ebbed; I felt like I was going to shit. The other two let go of the hold they had on me and Jim moved in between me and the desk and slowly filled my mouth with cock, and the pain was gone and Jack slowly pushed in further, and then back out as Jim’s cock rose to full erection in my mouth and found its way down my throat. Mark stood next to me and found my cock and was slowly wanking it as I became more and more erect. Jack began fucking me in earnest and the others watched and tried to match his rhythm. From firefly to lightning, my old sexual experiences to this amazing multiple experience-I choked on Jim’s cock as it fucked my mouth and my own cock felt like it was truly, literally going to explode, and my asshole was the center of the universe. I wanted this moment in time to last forever. My asshole and my mouth were both gaping maws that wanted to be filled with cock, day and night, night and day. Jack pounded me as Jim stuffed my gullet; I imagined a pig, apple in mouth and stuffing of some sort up his ass, on the spit. I thought, a far-away blink of consciousness, that I could remain like this forever.

Jim emptied his balls down my throat as Jack suddenly moaned and groaned as if he were dying-thirty seconds or so later, he emptied his balls in my ass, and I -with Jim pulling out of my mouth, and Jack leaning against me, breathing heavily and noisily in my ear-shot another load. I truly saw stars and fireworks. I assumed we were finished, but Jack pulled out of me and his hand wiped my ass crack and a second later another cock immediately rubbed against my hole, and it must have opened as Mark’s smaller cock easily entered me. The pain was brief as he quickly pounded away at my ass. Amazingly, my own member, having just unloaded on the desk, jumped in response. Jack’s hand came to my mouth and he said, “This my cum from your ass and your ass juices, lick my hand clean, cum-slut.” My eyes were closed as fireworks danced across my eyelids, so I obeyed immediately, eagerly licking the pungent moisture from his hand as he inserted his fingers for me to suck clean. My mind knew what was before me, but it just made me hornier and lustful for more cock, more cum, more ass juice, whatever. It was right then I became aware of what they knew already, that I was a pig that would do anything for lust.

A Hot Hook-Up

I am a 40-years old cd who gets off dressing up really slutty. I love wearing nylons or hose, heels, short skirts, bras, panties, wigs, make-up, and painted nails. I love to have my body shaved smooth because it makes me feel soft and fem. When I am all made up all I want to do is please a man. I suck dick, rim ass, swallow cum, and I love to bend over and take it deep in my tight ass.

I had been really needing some action so I got on the computer trying to find a guy to fulfill my needs. It took a while but I eventually set up a meeting at a hotel not far from home for the upcoming weekend. We swapped some pics and I was really impressed with his cock. I could hardly wait.

Friday arrived and I went to the hotel and started getting ready by taking a hot bubble bath and shaving my body. I then appllied my nails and painted both my fingers and toes a deep red. After that, I did my make-up really slutty and put on a short, dark wig. Next came the black bra and panty set I had recently bought, then my black stockings and black 4″ strappy heels. To finish it off I put on a short, tight black silky dress.

I still had about 45 minutes to wait and my cock was SO hard, I decided to relive the pressure by jacking off before he arrived. I was so worked up that I blew a huge load in my hand then eagaerly licked it clean. I really hoped this was going to be a hot night.

He called for the room number right on time. I gave to him then took one last look in the mirror. I felt that I looked good and hoped he would feel the same. The knock came at the door and I nervously opened it and let him in. The look in his eyes answered my question about my look. There was total lust in his eyes and I loved the way he was checking me out.

He was hot! He stood about 6’2″ with a nice build and brown hair. His arms were strong but not overly muscular and his face was clean shaven and he looked to be in his mid 30’s. I could see the bulge begin to grow in his tight jeans. It was definitely impressive. I couldn’t wait to get it out.

After I closed the door, he took me in his arms and kissed me hard. His tongue was in my mouth and I was getting a little dizzy with passion. It was then I noticed his hands squeezing my ass as he pulled me close enough that I could feel his hardening cock pressing against me. He paused from the kiss long enough to tell me that he really liked how I looked. After another deep kiss, I broke the embrace and led him into the room. We sat on the bed and I told him that I thoght he was very attractive and that I could hardly wait to see him naked.

“Soon baby. Right now I want to see you model that sexy dress for me.” I stood up and slowly turned, letting him take in the view. As I came back around facing him, I saw the smile on his face letting me know he was pleased.

“I was wondering if you would mind if I take a picture of you? You really look sexy and I want to be able to look at you later.”

“No problem. Take as many as you want.”

Over the next few minutes, I posed for him as he took quite a few pictures. His erection was straining against his jeans and my mouh was watering at the thought of it being in my mouth. I was about to go crazy. I needed it and I needed it NOW. I had to make my move so I got on my knees in front of him and started rubbing his hard dick thru those tight fucking jeans.

“I need your cock in my mouth baby. You are making me nuts. Please take it out now.”

He smiled as he stood and slowly unzipped his jeans and pushed them down to his knees. He wasn’t wearing any underwear so that beautiful cock stood straight out. It was gorgeous, about 8″, and about average thickness. He kicked off his shoes so I finished pulling his pants off. Then I was on it.

I took him in my hand and slowly slid my hand up and down his entire lenght. His dick was so warm and the skin so soft. A bit of pre-cum appeared on the head and I quickly licked it off, tasting his juice. I then licked up and down the shaft, wetting his dick from base to head. I also licked his balls, taking one, then the other in my mouth. He was moaning softly as I worshipped his manhood. I worked my way back to the head, opened my mouth, and began working it in. Slowly I took more and more till I had half of his hot dick, then I started sucking. Up and down, up and down, sucking and slobbering all over his meat. The wetter it got the more I took. I relaxed my throat and took more. I wanted it all.

He was moaning louder now, coaxing me on. He put his hands on my head and gently pushed down until I had taken every inch. I started to gag and he released his grip but I was intent on deep throating his dick. I took a breath and went back down, taking it all and pauseing.

“Holy shit! That feels good Jamie. Suck my dick!”

I went back to working up and down, taking all of his dick about every 3 or 4 motions.he tasted wonderful and I loved feeling him fucking my mouth. I hated taking it out, but to break for air every so often, at which time I would stroke him firmly. I kept this up for a good 15 minutes, hearing him take a picture everyy now and then. He eventually pulled me up off of him.

“Take you panties off and get on the bed on all fours.”

I did as I was told and heard the camera again. A few more pics and then he was pushing my dress up to my waist. The next thing I knew, he was licking my hot hole. His tongue was all over my ass, licking and flicking it on my entrance. I felt so good I couldn’ t help but let out a moan. I was in heaven and his tongue was giving me so much pleasure.

“Oh yes baby, eat me. Eat my ass good. Fuck it with that hot tongue.”

His tongue was inside me, darting in and out then all around. Then he was stroking my hard member, almost taking me over the edge. I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Fuck me baby. I need you in me! Please fuck me with that hot cock.”

I felt the head pressing against me. More pics. I felt more pressure, then as his cock slowly slid in, I heard the camera clicking away. He kept pushing until he was buried to the hilt. I felt so full. I loved it. He held it there, letting me get used to his size, then started a slow and easy motion. He would puul back until he was almost out then push slowly all the way back in. My body was electric and soon I was moving to meet his gentle thrust. We had a good. rythm going and I was loving it.

“Oh god you feel so good in me. Fuck me baby! Oh fuck me deep. Give me every inch of that hard dick. Fuck that ass baby! Fuck it hard.”

He picked up the pace and started slamming it in a litttle harder. I cock jumped with every thrust. My whole body was tingleing so I pushed back against him every time he buried his dick in me.

“Shit! Fuck me baby! Fuck me like the slut I am. Use my ass motherfucker! Fuck me hard and deep.”

He started slamming his dick in me. Fucking me so hard that I moaned with every thrust. I could hear the sound of our bodies smacking together. He continued to fuck me with a vengance. Then it happened. He had pushed me to the edge of extacy.

“Fuck! I’m going to cum! Fuck me baby! OH YES, FUCK MY ASS! OH GOD! OH GOD, I’m CUMMMMINNNNG”

My cock started twitching and then it exploded. Cum shot out of my cock with spasm after spasm. I thought I was going to blackout. My ass tightened around his dick as he rammed me hard and fast. Then he sank it deep one more time and began filling me with his spunk. He gripped my hips tight and held me against him as his cock jumped and twitched with each spurt. As the orgasm subsided, he slowly loosened his grip but did not pull out until he started going limp. When he finally fall out, I felt his cum start to ooze out. We were both exhausted and fell on the bed holding each other. We rested for a while before round two. More to cum. Until then, XXXOOO.

5 Guys – The First Time

I knew I was going to be in town for two days, so I posted an ad on craigslist looking for some company. I got several of the usual lame replies, and a few that seemed promising. I chatted with a few guys for a bit, and finally found one who was willing to meet me at a local cruise park.

I pulled up, wearing my favorite Naughty Kitty t-shirt over a bra and my medium breast forms, a denim mini skirt, 7″ heels, and my blonde wig. A few minutes after I parked, a guy walked up to my window.

“Kayla?” he asked.

“It’s me,” I replied.

We talked for a minute, then he got into my car. With my console we weren’t able to do much, so I suggested we move to his truck.

Once we were in his truck I rubbed on his leg for a few minutes until he unzipped his pants. I began to suck on his penis. It was an average size, but clean and pleasant, so I was enjoying myself, and judging by his moaning and wiggling around, so was he!

After a few minutes he suddenly jumped and shouted! I almost hit my head on the steering wheel, and when I looked up there was a black man standing just outside of the driver’s window, who had apparently been watching us for some time!

My partner quickly lost his erection as he rolled down the window and made a bit of small talk before the other guy moved away. I started to go back down, but he was no longer in the mood so I got out and he left.

I straightened my clothes and walked around the parking area for a few minutes. This park is arranged mostly in a long curve, with a makeshift turn-around at the end, so everyone there can see me as I walk. (That really turns me on, knowing that all of these strange men can see me as I act out my slutty fantasies!) I walked all the way to the farthest end of the park and then turned and walked back. Two cars passed slowly as I walked, but neither stopped, so I kept on walking to my car. I passed close to the other few cars there, but nobody seemed interested in me, so I left the park and drove around for a bit. I passed through two other cruise areas nearby, but both were completely empty, so after about 20 minutes I ended up back at the same park.

By this time I had also received another email from someone who wanted to meet me. I told him where to find me, then drove and parked.

There were a few more vehicles this time around, so I drove the length of the park, making sure that everyone could see into the car. Then I parked and again got out and walked around for a bit.

I walked up to a nice big truck. he put down the driver’s window as I approached, so I stopped. he started talking to me, and began to rub his hand on my bottom and legs. I rested my hand on the door of the truck, and he took my hand and placed it on his average-sized cock. After we rubbed each other for a few minutes, he invited me into his truck. I naturally accepted.

I leaned over to accept my second cock of the night, and he wasted no time in putting his hand on my back, then my neck and head, encouraging me to work harder. I was happy to comply! He got really hard a few times, and I thought he was about to come, but he never did, and after almost fifteen minutes (I saw the clock on his dash board), he decided to leave, so I stepped out, hoping to find another customer.

I walked slowly back toward my car, and as I passed the picnic pavilion I saw a cigarette light up. I turned and walked into the darkness and saw two men talking. They both stopped and looked at me, and I recognized one as the voyeur from earlier. He smiled at me, and the other looked a bit uncomfortable and walked away.

Once the voyeur and I were alone, he sat on the picnic table with his back to the road. As I walked closer he unzipped his pants. before I was within arm’s reach I could smell his unwashed crotch! I walked slowly past him, allowing him to slide a quick hand under my skirt, and then moved away. I cannot stand an unwashed man!

As I got back to my car I saw a guy standing behind his truck. I walked toward him slowly, and circled his vehicle. He didn’t move away or react, so I moved closer to him, turning my back and wiggling my skirt. He made a comment about my outfit, so I asked if he’s like to see one of the others. He did, so I walked back to my car, reached into the back seat, and pulled out another outfit.

It was my tiniest black skirt, and a black tank top that just covers my breast forms and makes them look so hot! When I change with my back to someone, I can remove the bra and everything and it looks like they are real. i did that and returned to him. he rubbed on my tummy and told me how sexy I was, then he slid his hand around and cupped my butt cheek, running his finger along my crack.

I let him feel me up for a minute, then he ran his hand up my back, to my shoulder, and gently pushed down. I caught his hint and dropped to my knees in front of him. I closed my eyes, opened my mouth, and in a few seconds he slid himself into my mouth. I stayed still as he slowly moved in and out, then he began to move quicker as he realized that I enjoyed letting him be in total control.

He hit the back of my throat, then quickly pulled back and stopped moving for a minute. I leaned forward and ran my tongue along his shaft, then took him all the way into my mouth and throat. He seemed to figure out that I enjoyed it deep, and he then resumed pumping himself into my face.

I experimented with giving him a hummer, but it didn’t seem to make a difference for him, so I stopped the noise and knelt there like an obedient little slut. I tried a few times to take his hands and place them on the back of my head, but each time he pulled his hands away from mine. He finally pulled out of my mouth and shot his load onto the pavement before I could stop him, then he said an awkward thanks and drove away.

As nobody else in the park looked interesting, I drove around again for a while, then headed back. My other email person hadn’t shown, or so I thought, so I parked, got out, and began to change once again, this time into my gray sports bra and my CHEER shorts. I walked to the picnic table again and did some cheerleader type stretches, then walked around the walking trail ending up back at my car.

I changed once more, enjoying the feel of the cool air on my naked and shaved body as I removed my shorts and put on a long button-down shirt that was’t quite long enough to cover my white cotton panties. As I looked up I noticed a black man standing there in some sort of fire suit, watching me closely.

He complimented my outfit and my sexy body, and as I sat in the driver’s seat to throw my other clothes into the back seat, he moved closer, unzipped his suit and exposed his penis. he just stood there stroking it for a minute, then asked me if I wanted to touch it. I held my hand out and he placed his penis on it and started moving back and forth. My fingers naturally curled around it and I let him fuck my hand for a little while.

He took a step forward and was now standing between my legs. He moved his penis to my mouth and I took him in. I pleasured him for a short time until a small truck pulled in to the park. My partner quickly hid his penis as the truck drove in and passed right next to us. He waited for a minute until the truck had passed, then pulled his penis back out for me to continue. We played together for a few minutes and then as the truck returned he seemed to get nervous and walked away.

The truck ended up parking only a few feet from my car, and the driver just sat there. I check my email and had no new mails, so I got out and walked around the new truck. As I walked up, the driver rolled his window down and put his arm on the door. I stopped in front of his window, and when I looked down I saw a nice large dick (I’d guess 9 inches long, and having a decent girth). Everyone else tonight had been pretty average (in the 5 – 6″ range), so this was looking like it would be a treat!

I rested my hand on the door of the truck, and he asked me “You want this dick?”

I smiled and didn’t say anything, so he took my hand and placed it on his dick. I began rubbing it slowly, and he made a few sounds that let me know that I was doing a good job. He reached out and began rubbing my legs and bottom. At this point I noticed that we were being watched by two guys in another truck not too far away. This made me even hornier, so I pulled my hand out and walked around to his passenger door. He opened it up and i smiled at the watchers, removed my button down shirt (leaving me only in a sports bra and panties) then laid down across his truck seat with my bottom hanging out of the truck and took my new friend into my mouth. I worked on his large penis for several minutes. More than once he told me “Oh, yeah, baby. Deep throat that big black cock,” as I went as far down as I could.

After several more minutes I needed to shift positions, so I took the opportunity to change clothes as well. “I’ll be right back, sweetie,” I told him as I wiggled myself out of the truck.

I stood up , smiled at the two voyeurs, then reached into my car for my schoolgirl outfit. It has a cute little plaid skirt, and a button down blouse I found at a thrift store. i turned my back to my new friend, who was already standing behind me, removed my sports bra, and replaced it with a lacy white bra. Then I slid my skirt up my legs and pulled the blouse on and buttoned it up.

“Oh, a sexy school girl,” he said.

“Do you like to take advantage of your little white school girl?” I asked him.

He smiled and pulled his penis out, so i knelt between my car and his truck and got back to work, doing my best Jenna Haze impression as I sucked and stroked his large tool. After another few minutes he moved over and leaned on the side of his truck.

“Do you fuck?” he asked.

“No, not tonight,” I replied.

“Oh, okay,” he said, then he felt me up one more good time, got in his truck and drove away.

As I was now completely wound up, I walked past the two guys who had been watching, but they didn’t acknowledge me, so after passing the picnic table, I turned around and walked back to my car again.

My first customer of the night had returned during my walk, so I walked back up to his truck. We talked for a minute, and when I offered to get back in his truck, he declined. Shortly after, he drove away. Soon the few remaining vehicles drove off, leaving me by myself, so I headed back to my hotel, where I wandered the halls in a bikini, wig and heels, then crawled into bed for a short nap before work the next morning.

The next morning I received an email from my second craigslist guy, saying how sexy he thought I was as I changed clothes in the park! Was he one of the guys in the other truck?

Trap Door Lady Boy.

His strong hands were squeezing my hips tightly as he was pumping his hard rod into me. The cool night air was kissing the beads of sweat on my exposed cheeks. I could feel a familiar pinching sensation in my slender thighs from the black lace panties that had been pulled down to my knees. I barely know the man behind me. It isn’t even like he was my first tonight. However, the sense of being filled with his hard dick repeatedly invading my thoroughly abused ass hole is better than the emptiness I had been feeling in its absence. This man, who has been a coworker of my father’s for longer than I have been alive, is now ruthlessly driving his cock into me. He is needlessly trying to be sexy, calling me a slut, asking if I love how his cock feels, and demanding that I beg him for his load.

I would have let him fuck me regardless of whether or not I found him attractive. It has been at least two weeks since I last heard from Jake. It would seem that he wasn’t ready for a public relationship, which had been what I was craving for as long as I can remember. It was with that simple disagreement that Jake would move on leaving me all alone. Since then, I have been bouncing from one cock to another. It was only when I was dressed up as Alex, that I felt alive. Yet, tonight at least, it was as if I was chasing the high I felt that first night with Jake.

The man I have come to know as Mr. Dodson was furiously pumping me in our backyard while my dad was on a beer run. Part of me would hope that my mom came outside only to bear witness to the slut she had raised. My parents were okay with me dressing and even going out to meet men, however, the rule was that I couldn’t dress up with company over. I was also sure that they would not approve of me letting their married friends cum in my ass. I had already been fucked by two different men before I got home to see Mr. Dodson eyeing me while my Dad was searching for his keys. Within seconds of him leaving, Mr. Dodson would come over and try to chat casually. I wondered if he could feel the other men’s semen in my dirty hole as he was plunging in and out of me.

It was just as I heard my dad’s car pulling up to the other side of the house that Mr. Dodson shot two ropes of cum on my ass. I had already asked him to cum inside me for fear of him staining my clothes. He, evidently felt that I wasn’t worth the courtesy as he ejaculated all over my new top and skirt. I was able to slip into the basement unseen before my dad could return to his sweaty disgusting friend.

White Cross Dresser Party Girl

After months of resisting my feminine slutty side, I finally gave in one day when I agreed to meet a thug black meth dealer to PNP. I knew what that meant and craved it. I shaved my entire body smoothly, douched out my ass, and packed my “sex bag” with my analyze, lube, poppers, black thick butt plug, and a few different sexy outfits. I also packed a long-length black wig. Underneath my sweats, I had dressed in the sluttiest possible outfit. Black fishnet stockings, red lace G-string, black tight see-through mini skirt, black bra, and a see-through black half-shirt.

We went to pick up the dealer first, then headed to a cheap hourly motel in the hood. $28 for two hours.

As soon as we got inside, the dealer told me he had to go get weed but wanted to shower first. He handed me an 8ball of really strong meth to get the party started. He jumped in the shower as I made a couple of lines to sniff. I snorted it up and everything seemed to slow down as the powerful wave of pure animal of sexual loss swept over me. I vaguely remember him coming out and pushing me to my knees to deep throat his hard cock and telling me to poke my booty up high so he could booty bump me. He grabbed my asscheeks and spread them apart, then spit on my hole. He pushed a huge rock in my ass, all the way to his knuckle. Waves of lust rolled over my body as he moved me to the bed. I remember getting on my belly and poking my ass up high. I reached back with both hands and spread my asscheeks wide open. I took some of my drool from my wet mouth and used the spit to wet my hole.

Tony stood in front of me and I nursed his hard cock with my mouth. When he was rock hard, he moved behind me and took a picture of my wet hole. “You gonna get a lot of Nigga cock in your white pussyhole tonight, bitch,” I vaguely heard him say as he pressed the engorged head of his black cock against my tight shit hole.

Then he put a little bottle of poppers under my nose and told me to sniff it deeply. As soon as I did, he forcefully pressed it down hard. All 12” of thick cock pressed down through my sphincter muscle and into my guts. It didn’t take long for him to speed up the violent pounding as he rode his cock harder and harder into my violated anal cavity. I was grunting and moaning as he pumped the entire length of his cock into my rectum. I pushed it in as hard as he could. I could feel it throbbing as his Nutt went deep into my ass. As soon as he was done, Tony pulled his huge cock out and slapped my face with it.

I lay there still holding my asscheeks apart and got so turned on. My hole was totally open and dripping Nutt. I fingered my hole to keep it open.

I saw him staring at my violated hole. “Yo bitch, you owe me $100 for the stuff.” I said, “I don’t have any money right now to pay for it.” He laughed and said, “until you pay me back, that fine white ass in mine. I’ll pump your hole full of nuts, bitch. And you’ll take care of people until I tell you to stop. You understand?” I nodded my head. He told me to wait in the room while he went to buy some weed.

I was still super horny when I heard a knock on the door. I thought it was Tony. It was the motel clerk instead telling me the time was up. They only took cash and I only had $10 left. What made things worse was my cell wasn’t charged. I quickly showered and got dressed. I took all the remaining meth with me.

I planned to wait 15 minutes for Tony, then go to a Starbucks to recharge. Two hours later and I still hadn’t found a place with a charger. That meant a long walk home through a pretty bad part of town.

I started walking still feeling that sexy feeling in my ass and tingling from the T. I was still wearing my slutty outfit with my jacket over it. As I walked, I noticed a guy walking up on me. When he caught up, we started to talk. He said I looked hot. I thanked him. As soon as he asked me if I liked to party, I got immediately horny just thinking about the hot sex I had earlier and the lust burning inside me for more.

I told him I was really horny and asked him if he had any T. He told me he only had cracked and that we could go to his tent to smoke it. I said ok and felt his hand on my asscheek as we walked. He slowly rubbed his finger against my still open and wet hole. “Feels like you already got some dick, bitch. You ready for some real Nigga cock?” I came a little when he said that. My hole was throbbing.

As we walked along the dark street, we passed by tents with mostly homeless black men living in them. They silently watched us walk and I could only imagine what they were thinking. We passed by an RV that had a tough-looking big black guy standing in front. “Where did you find your sexy little white girl,” he said as he looked me up and down. I looked at his crotch and saw his hand stroking his huge semi-hard cock through his pants. LeRoy said, “she’s a sissy. I’m just going to party with her in my tent. Can I get $40 of rock?” The drug dealer handed him a little bag and told LeRoy to pay up. LeRoy looked at me and I told him I didn’t have any money. The dealer looked at me with a very hard stare. “Turn around bitch. I want to see your sexy booty. I unzipped my jacket so he could see what I was wearing, then slowly turned around and grabbed my smooth asscheeks with my hands. He said, “spread that ass for me, baby.” I did and he pulled the panty string to the side and took a picture of my bootyhole, still slightly open and wet from before. He looked at us and said I could pay him later. In my meth and sexual fog, I didn’t really know what that meant other than the fact that we got the drug I so desperately needed to keep my raging sexual energy going. LeRoy knew what that meant and I noticed how he wasn’t as nice to me and sounded more like a thug.

When we got to the tent, I quickly took off my jacket and pulled out my lube and poppers. LeRoy packed the crack pipe with rock and took a big hit and put it in my mouth and I breathed deep. There was an immediate reaction and I felt super horny. Things got intense fast. LeRoy pushed me to my knees and jammed his cock down my throat. It was huge and my mouth barely fit around it. He roughly facefucked me, only stopping to hit the pipe and popper me up. He slapped my face, then flipped me over onto my belly. “Poke that booty up slut and take this Nigger dick!” I screamed out as he roughly forced his entire hard thick cock into me with one stroke. It started to feel really good so I was talking super dirty, begging him to give me his cock. To sodomize me. To make me his sissy bitch. To pimp me out to niggers all night long.

He flooded my rectum with his nutt then had me suck him clean. He laid back in the tent and I deep-throated him in between taking more hits on the pipe. I heard someone just outside the tent and heard LeRoy say “$20”. A $20 bill landed inside the tent and I realized what was about to happen. I started to say no, but LeRoy just gave me another hit on the pipe and held my head still as some guy rubbed lube on my hole then plunged his cock inside me.

Naked Physical Force Determined Who Would Be In Control.

I could start to taste this slippery fluid, his pre-cum as it hit my tongue, it was warm and felt like it was foaming up in my mouth. I loved that taste and loved that I was exciting him this much. The feel of him sliding over my lips and on my tongue was wonderful, I could have done this all day for him.

He stopped and took his cock out of my mouth; I hoped that I had not done something wrong because I needed to continue. I looked up to see his face and noticed that he was smiling. “You are doing great he said but I want to try another position, kneel in front of me here.” As I kneeled he stepped out of his pants and took off his shirt, he was now naked. This man had a nice body, very strong and well kept for his age. He had great strong legs and a nice ass also. He turned around and bent in front of me and told me to lick that back of his legs but to reach between his legs and keep stroking his cock.

I licked his legs and ran my tongue from the back of his knees to his thighs while I stroked his cock. He loved this and moaned loudly while I continued. He turned his head and said, “this is so hot, but now I need your lips on my ass” I was so hot at this point that I thought I would puncture my pants! I started to kiss and lick his tight ass and he said “deeper”. He reached back and pulled his cheeks apart for me, I could now see his bum and thought here we go! I put my face in and attached my lips to his ass, he groaned and said “oh yea, suck my ass for me”. I still had his cock in hand and kept stroking slowly, my hand was now covered with his precum and it made pumping easier.

I slowly put my tongue on his ass and licked in small circles dipping my tongue inside every time around. I loved how nasty this was. I licked up and down until he stepped back and turned back around.

“You are so good you could make money doing that.” he joked.

He told me that he wanted to ride my face and that I should try not to gag on his shaft. I couldn’t wait to get his cock in my mouth again, and I didn’t need to wait long. He held my head and starts fucking my mouth slowly and deeply, on some of the strokes his balls would hit my chin, which really excited me.

“Oh you’re a great cock sucker he said, take me, deep honey, hold my ass while I drill your throat.” My lips were stretched to the max and I loved it, his cock was sliding deep but I didn’t gag at all. I could taste his fluid-leaking non-stop into my mouth; it made him so slippery that it helped him go deeper. “Use your tongue on me, honey, wrap it around my cock, suck that cum out of me, blow me, baby, blow me he said.”

And blow him I did, I sucked his cock as hard as I could, but softly. I wanted his load and I wanted it soon, I also waited all night for this to happen and now I will get my reward.

He started to pump faster and breathe harder; I knew my time had come. “Suck me, baby, suck me, I’m Cumming, I’m Cumming.” It hit me with force and quick spurts, I held his hips while he shot into my mouth, I was surprised how warm his cum was and how it ticked on the way down my throat. I was in love, not with him but with sucking cock.

He pulled his now deflating cock out of my mouth and wiped it on my face, “let me just paint you a bit he said,” I smiled. He fell back into the soft chair and his spent cock was lying on his leg.

I couldn’t resist the urge to lean over and rest my hands on his thighs and I looked at him and asked, “can I suck you clean?”

“Yeah man, suck my cock clean for me,” he said.

One last time I needed to taste him and relish his size.

Rainy Horny Day

Anyway – I was so horny and wanting to taste and swallow as many loads of cum as I could. walking around the house all dressed up and nowhere to go I logged on to a hook-up site. I replied to 3 posts and continued to scroll through the rest. WOW within a few minutes I got a response. A married bi guy was going to the store and wanted a hookup. He liked my reply and the photos I sent him so we made arrangements to meet.
An hour later in a shopping center parking lot, I got in his car. He looked OMG you’re gorgeous and rested his hand on my black stocking-covered leg. I smiled reached over and rubbed his cock as his hand slide under my skirt and snapped one of my garter straps.
He started to drive and I leaned over and took his hard cock out and went down on him. We never made it out of the parking lot he parked between 2 trucks. I continued to suck as he pulled up my skirt and slide his hand inside my frilly red panties. He started to play with my little clitlet as I pressed my lips to his groin and bobbed my head up and down. Within 3 minutes he unloaded a gush of sticky cum deep in my mouth and I swallowed and swallowed as he flowed. MMMM YUMMMY.
I pulled off him licking my lips and smiled at him. He was jerking my clitlet his hand covered the entire little limp thing. I said no problem hon no need to continue if you are satisfied. once back to my car, I bent down kissed his limp cock smiled at him. Hope to see you again I said as I exited.
Before I left the parking lot I checked my messages. One was from a guy to who I replied to his post. A trucker who was broke down at a near-by truck stop looking for a Girl like me. So I messaged him and we made arrangements to hook up later last evening (those rarely turn out).
I took a long way home driving down the highway with my skirt hiked up showing my stocking tops and garter straps flashing anyone who wanted a peek. Once home I reviewed my messages and there was another from the 3rd guy I replied to his post. It was interesting but I already committed to the tucker.
I did some housework all the time so fucking horny just wanting to flow my Girly cum and could not wait till 6:00 came so I could meet the trucker.
I freshened up changed into a black pleated dress, long blond wig, black lace panties, white stockings, and 6 strap garter-belt, White petticoat, and black heels, and drove to the meet.
I smiled as I saw him there and pulled up to chat. He was just as he described in his post. A tall black man in his 40’s well built and gay. He said his truck had broken down and could not be fixed until today. I drove next to his rig and we got in it. Ok, the same old story He grabbed my head pulled it down, and rammed his black cock in my mouth, and mouth fucked me. 10 min later I was swallowing his cum and licking his cock. That’s it another fucking disappointment in my park. At least he could have done was taken me in the sleeper cab and fucked me.
I got out limp and frustrated and drove to the parking area. This was a truck stop I only was out a few times so I thought I would make the best of it and hopefully meet some new truckers.
Watching the trucks pull in and the guys going into the store I waited for a half-hour till the rain let up a little. as the tucks filled the parking lot I opened the car door swung my leg out rising my dress showing a little leg shot (hanging out the bait LOL )
Got a few catcalls and whistles and “hey Babes” until one guy approved me. “what you looking for: he said “just to suck as many cocks and get fucked as I can” I replied. “You are a slut aren’t you,” he said “YUP” and took my hand walking me across the parking lot to the back of the restroom area. It was still raining lightly as he leaned against the wall under the overhang and took out his cock. I reached for it as I went to my knees in the wet muddy area (the white stockings were not a good idea but looked cute) and took it in my mouth sucking licking swallowing it. Of course, he held my head and fucked my mouth until he came. pumping his cum in my mouth as I slurped it with the rain dripping from my hair.
He pulled out as he did another guy (did not know he was there) held my head and pushed his hard cock in my mouth before I was finished swallowing the previous load.
the rain got harder running down off the roof of the building pouring down on me as sucked his cock. As I licked his cock clean after he came I looked around and saw 2 other guys stroking their cocks.
My makeup smeared, my hair straight, dress soaked, white stocking a muddy mess heels laying in the mud off my feet as the soaking wet rain pored down and ran off the roof.
One of the guys (a Latino) said in broken English “I’m going to fuck you” he pulled me up from the muddy ground spun me around sideways under the overhang. he lifted my dress and petticoat pulled down my panties as he bent me over held my hips and started to fuck me (his cock felt so good inside me that’s all I wanted all day was to get fucked). I pushed back humping him as he humped me.
The other guy stood in front of me lifted my head and pressed his black cock to my lips. I opened my mouth to take it and have always held my head and rammed it in. He fucked my mouth for I was too involved his humping that hard cock that was fucking me felt so good.
they both came about the same time and it felt so nice flowing deep inside my sissy hole.
They pulled out and walked away.
I even flowed as he fucked me which was my goal. I was a soaking wet mess. picked up my heels out of the mud and rain to the car. Lucky I always carry a few towels with me. I dried off the best I could take off my wet dress, petticoat, and stockings that I left on the ground next to the car. There was a sweater in the back seat I was going to take to the dry cleaners so I slipped it on and drove home
So all in all that I got what I went out to do satisfied for another week or so.

White Transwoman Sleeps with her nemesis, A Black co-worker.

Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap….

My head is spinning and my whole body is tingling. My heart is racing, and I feel the long phallic object moving in and out of my ass with vigor. My little clit is swinging back and forth between my legs, as I am on all fours on a hotel bed. I am filled with excitement and ecstasy as I am lost in the throes of being thoroughly fucked.

Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap….

I look up to the full-length mirror that is across from the bed. A large muscular and handsome black man is kneeling behind me with his hands gripping onto my waist, as his hips keep slapping my white ass cheeks. His chiseled and sexy body glistens with sweat as he is looking down at his cock moving in and out of my white asshole. My modest breasts are swinging tightly from my chest in the same rhythm as my small half swollen clitty. My long dark brown hair drapes over my right shoulder as I am panting and moaning with the repetitive thrusts that are being worked upon my body.

Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap….

I feel the long thick black cock of this sexy stud working inside of me. His strokes rub my insides and are constantly poking at my prostate. I feel the stretching of both pain and pleasure in my neglected ass. My toes are trying to curl up into my feet as I feel them shaking with pure pleasure.

Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap….

I look back to the black man that is behind me. He is fucking me like it is his purpose in life. His light brown eyes and his nice trimmed short black hair. The square cut jaw that just begs to be touched while your lips are pressed against his big soft lips. How have I not realized how sexy and handsome this man is? Why is he interested in a transwoman like me?

Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap…. Thwap….

My green eyes scan the room and the mirror trying to recall how I got here and what has happened. Was it all the weed that I had smoked? Was it the empty bottle of champagne that is sitting next to the hotel TV? Was it the success of our meetings the last couple days?

I do not know, and frankly, I don’t really care. I just know that this is the best I have felt in a long time.

I feel happy.

I feel good.

I feel full.

I feel like I am about to explode.

————————–

One Week Ago

Knock Knock Knock. “Brenda….”

I look up from my computer screen to see my boss, a six-foot-tall middle aged white male with salt and pepper hair, looking at me. Mr. Jones is an attractive man in his own right. Not in the best shape as he has developed a dad bod over the last few years. His wife is at home with their two kids. He is a nice guy and has really treated me well being the only trans person in company history.

“Yes sir.” I responded with a smile. I am not sure how long he has been standing there as I have been so wrapped up in a few of the marketing projects that I have been delegated.

“I am going to send Tyronne with you to San Francisco next week.”

I feel my stomach jump into my throat and I am filled with frustration at the news. Tyronne, or Ty as he likes everyone to call him, is the big shot at the firm. He is your prototypical jock that is looking for praise and to always show up the people that he is ‘competing’ against. I say competing because he thinks that everything is a competition. Who was the one that got this deal. How much more was that contract than yours. Hey, I am better than you kind of attitude. We have never gotten along.

“Why is that? I can make the pitch to Sephora on my own. I really don’t need him with me.” I respond.

Let’s hope that I can talk my way out of this. I don’t know if I could go on a trip with that guy. Listen to him talk about himself the whole time. He is such a pig-headed jerk.

“He is going to make a pitch to the Golden State Warriors the day before your pitch to Sephora. I know the two don’t have anything to do with one another, but I would like for you to work together. We could really use those two deals. It will do great things for the company and I want my two-best people on it.” Mr. Jones says with a big smile.

I smile back at him. “Okay sir. I will do my best.”

“I know you will. The two of you won’t let me down.” Mr. Jones says before patting the frame of my office door and continuing down the hallway.

Great. Just what I needed. Not only do I have to try and land the biggest deal of my career, but I have to land two of them with a guy that I just can’t stand.

Very few people in the office knew I was a transwoman. I transitioned into a girl at a young age of 16 in a Hurst Texas. I realized that I was not like other boys. I was more sensitive and not as rough. I preferred the more ‘girly’ things in life, like playing with dolls and pretend house. I wanted to play with the girls and do girly things when I was a child. My parents always noticed that I was different too.

My family was supportive and helped be through a lot growing up and trying to fit in. It became more evident that I was not comfortable as a boy when I was caught wearing my older sisters clothes. Instead of getting mad, my parents took me to a few doctors. I went through a lot of phycological and physical analysis before I even hit puberty. I was suffering from a severe case of gender dysphoria. The best course of action was to start me on Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT), and to change schools with the goal of changing my sex.

The rest of my life, going through puberty, high school, and college was filled with ups and downs. Life was a lot more bearable than my prepubescent youth was. I felt like myself and was able to fit in with the other kids around me. I was able to get a degree in Marketing from Texas Tech University and get a job in Marketing as a solid career.

Just looking at me you couldn’t tell that I once identified as a boy. I looked, talked, and acted like a woman. The only way you could tell that I was not a girl by birth was my little penis between my legs. I got good at tucking it between my legs and panties. It helped that it never got very big due to the hormones that I took as a teenager. My hair grew into a beautiful Dark Brown chestnut mane. My features became soft and womanly. Even my breast sprouted into a good size C cup by the time I made it to college. I became a very attractive woman, and I loved my body. Maybe one day I would finish transitioning, but I am scared that my parts won’t work afterwards or that I would miss my penis.

I thought back to when I first met Tyronne Jackson. He came on strong and tried to hit on me. He was new at the company and had started a year after I did. He was cocky and full of energy. At the time I was dealing with the stress of my father passing away and I wasn’t dealing with life very well. He asked me out a number of times and I refused. He eventually gave up.

That is when his attitude toward me became more abrasive. He started to call me names behind my back. It started a back-and-forth war that was put to an end by Mr. Jones about 6 months ago. I had to admit that I did some things that I wasn’t proud of, but I was not going to let him treat me with disrespect. Needless to say, things between us have always been difficult. It felt like we were fire and ice. Black and white. Just to opposites that could never seem to really stand the other or co-exist in the same realm at the same time. Every time we would step into the same room together, you could feel the tension in the room, like walking into a bathroom after someone just took the hottest shower that they could. Just thinking about him made my skin crawl and feel icky.

I got back to work on getting my presentation for Sephora ready.

Ty showed up at my office later that afternoon knocking at my door. I looked up at him and saw that he wasn’t very happy. He must have gotten the same news that I had. He was wearing a nice light gray pair of slacks with a black button-down shirt and no tie.

“So….. I heard that we will be working together.” Ty avoided eye contact and was talking as if this is just something he wanted to just get over with.

“I guess so. How do you want to do this?” I said being short with him. I don’t really want to speak to him, and I want to do as little as possible.

“Let’s just meet in the conference room in an hour and we can talk about a game plan.” Ty said. I nodded and he turned and left.

It was Friday around 2 pm and our flights to San Francisco were on Wednesday. We didn’t have much time to really get on the same page. There was a big hurdle in front of us with not a lot of time to get ready.

An hour later we met in the conference room. I got there first and had a folder with some artwork ready to show off and a legal pad. I was making notes waiting for Ty to show up. Eventually he does and with nothing in his hands. He walks in and sits in the chair closest to the door. He puts one hand on the conference table and leans back in the chair all casual like.

“Look. So, this is what we are going to do. You are going to work on your presentation, and I am going to work on mine. You don’t get in my way and I won’t get in yours. We will go to San Fran together. We will go to each other’s meetings, but we won’t be involved. Cool? Cool…..” Ty says to me and then turns to get out of his chair.

I am sitting there offended and annoyed. “No……..” It just comes out of my mouth. What gives him the right to dictate how this is going to work. He just can’t come in here and tell me what to do. We were asked to work on these sales pitches together. There is too much on the line to just work on this alone and fail to get either of these clients.

Ty turns and looks at me with a sense of anger and frustration. “What do you mean no?”

“I mean no…. We are going to work on this together. We are both going to put in our work and get both of these clients. I can’t do it all by myself and Mr Jones is expecting us both to pull this thing out. As much as I hate the idea of working with you, I hate the idea of losing these clients and disappointing Mr. Jones more. If you don’t like it, you can just take it to him.”

Ty lets out a big sigh. “Fine, but don’t think this gives you the right to tell me how to make my pitch. It is my play and I will take it all the way for a touchdown. You just stand on the sidelines and be a good cheerleader.”

“That is another thing. I am not just some push over ‘cheerleader’ here. I do just as much as you do and I deserve just as much respect.” I snap back at him.

“No you don’t. You’re just some bitch that has gotten good at sucking the right dick.”

That was the last straw. Soon we get into an all-out screaming match with one another. Both of us are calling each other names and pulling up all the past shit that we have done to one another. People have started to gather in the halls, and it takes about 10 minutes before someone calls Mr. Jones stops us.

“That is enough, you two.” Ty and I go quiet. You can hear about a half a dozen people in the hallway talking. Both Ty and I are still fuming, but we stay quiet for Mr. Jones.

“I have had enough of your constant fighting and bickering. I was hoping that both of you would have worked this out a long time ago, but it looks like I was wrong. I am going to make this very simple. You both need to work together and get these clients. I want the Warriors and Sephora as our two top clients by next week. If we are missing even one of them, you both can consider yourselves fired……… Am I clear.”

Like two puppies that just got kicked by their owner, Ty and me both nod and look down at the ground.

“Good. Now I want to see you both in here tomorrow so you can work together on your pitches.”

Ty looks like he is about to say something about coming in on a Saturday but is cut off by Mr. Jones.

“I don’t care what you have going on. This is your priority. Now go home. Cool off and I want to see you both in here at 8 am.”

I nod my head in agreeance and Ty does the same, but more reluctantly.

“Now get out of here.” Mr. Jones says as Ty is the first to storm out. I gather my things and I am not too far behind.

I headed home after getting things cleaned up at my desk. No one stopped me to talk about what just happened. It was all just too soon. I got in my car and drove to my lonely two-bedroom apartment in Fort-worth. The events of the day have left me stressed and in need of a good drink.

I pulled out a bottle of my favorite red wine and a glass. I clicked on the TV for some background noise. The TV glowed to life with reruns of doctor pimple popper playing. It was one of my guilty pleasures, watching gross stuff getting cut open and popped on TV. I poured myself a glass and started to sip on it. I quickly began to think of how to make the awful situation better.

After a whole empty bottle of wine and two hours’ worth of bursting cysts, I started to feel lonely.

My love life wasn’t always lonely. I have had a few boyfriends here and there, but many of them couldn’t handle being in a relationship with a trans woman. Some of them wanted a natural born woman that could give them kids, or they just dated me because it was fun and worth a try. None of them really took it too seriously. Others when they found out what I was got furious and aggressive. They all thought that I was trying to trick them and called me harsh words like “Fag” and “Tranny bitch”. Very few good guys would ever give me a chance and if they did, they were real creeps. Most of the guys I dated were white. It was just the guys that found me attractive and gave me a chance.

I never really dated any other races much. A Hispanic once, but never a black guy. It just never came to my mind or was really attracted to one. In the area where I grew up there weren’t many black guys around. I didn’t really meet or talk to many till I got to college and moved to Dallas. Then I still didn’t find them attractive at all. My dad was white, and I was always attracted to men that looked and acted like him. I really don’t think that he would have ever approved of me dating anyone other than a white guy, but he never told me that directly.

It had been so long since I had felt the warm embrace of a man next to me, and I was beginning to forget what it felt like. I was beginning to forget what it was like to kiss a man and have him kiss me back. I just wanted to be loved and to love in return.

The wine was really starting to take effect and left me feeling horny. In times like this all I really had was Henry. That is what I called my dildo. He was a pink 7-inch doc Johnson dildo with a suction cup. He would always be there for me. The sad part was, is that I was starting to think that he is the only lover that I would ever have in my life.

I get up from my spot on the couch and put my empty glass in the sink and throw away the bottle. I pull a bottle of Jim Beam out of the cupboard and take a big swig right out of the bottle. I feel the burn of the Bourbon roll down my throat and fill me with warmth. My loins burn for some attention as I am growing hornier by the second. I put the cap back on the bottle and walk to my bedroom for some playtime.

I have always been the type of girl that has enjoyed porn and reading sexy literature online. It is something that helps me get off when I am alone. I love watching solo guys jerking and showing off their sexy bodies. I love to watch them get blown by good looking girls as I imagine that it is me between their legs with their cock in my mouth. While I am riding my dildo or using it on myself, I like to watch other transgirls getting fucked. Tonight, I needed to feel a cock in my pussy and I needed it badly.

I open up my laptop and go to some of my favorite porn sites. As I am looking through all the content, I am slowly removing all the work clothes from the day. I get down to my bra and panties as I feel my loins continue to set ablaze by my excitement. My little clitty girl cock is trying to get hard as it is tucked into my gaff underwear. As I am looking through all the porn, I start rubbing at my little clit over my panties. My nipples grow harder and harder as my excitement is building. I pull my bra off and toss it onto the floor with all the rest of my discarded clothing. I start to alternate between pinching and rolling my nipples between my fingers and hand rubbing at my girl cock with my left.

I move through all the clips and movies online and spend a good hour doing so. I am getting so worked up as I feel the alcohol still affecting my body as I had not eaten since lunch. Finally, I find something that gets me really hot. Something that would be worthy of me riding my dildo to. It starts with a tgirl porn star named Channel Santini and she is lounging around her bedroom in her underwear. She looks so good and you can hardly tell that she is a trans girl. Outside her sliding glass bedroom door is a sexy brunette white guy that is taking care of the lawn. He catches her in her underwear, and she invites him in. He learns of her little secret in her panties and doesn’t care. They start to play with each other and get one another hard.

I set my computer to the side and stripped off my panties. Between my legs I am completely smooth. I make it a point to go get waxed every so often. Everything from my eyebrows down is completely hair free and that is the way I like it. It makes me feel like the girl that I am. My cock doesn’t really get fully hard anymore. Yes it swells and feels really sensitive, but it never really gets hard enough to penetrate during sex due to the hormones and hormone blockers that I take. I start to rub and play with my cock. I feel the tingling sensations of the stimulation start to fill my body. My hands continue to explore my little cock, that is about 3 inches long at maximum, and my little itty-bitty balls.

My whole-body tingles with pleasure as I touch myself. Soon my fingers find my little asshole and I feel the growing ache of needing to be filled. I reach over to my bedside table and remove Henry and the lube. I climb off my bed and kneel down on the side of it with my chest resting on the edge. The screen of the porno movie is still at a perfect viewing angle. I squirt some lube into my right hand and apply it liberally to my needy anus. My small dainty manicured fingers push the lube into my hole. I start with one, then eventually move up to three fingers as I stretch out my hole for my pink boy Henry.

At this point in the movie, Channel is on all fours and the guy is getting ready to press his cock into her ass. This is perfect timing, because I am now starting to lube Henry up and press him inside of my ass pussy. I feel the rim of the head of the realistic dong pop through my anus with ease. Soon the whole thing is shoved deep in my ass, as I am moving it in and out with my hand. My mouth is open, and I am starting to moan and pant as I am giving pleasure to myself. I feel my little clit oozing precum down the inside of my thigh. The little girl cock as hard as it will ever get, but that doesn’t stop me. I just keep moving Henry in and out of my hungry hole. The veiny and thick cock rubbing at my anus and poking at my prostate feels amazing. So much better than the stimulation that I was giving my little clit not too long ago. As my right hand would get tired, I would switch off to the other hand and keep going. The scene on my laptop is continuing to unfold. Watching this sexy man take this girl is getting me both jealous and excited. I am putting myself in Channel’s shoes and wish it was me that was being taken by this sexy man. The scene changes to Channel riding on top of this guy. That is when I decide to change my position as well.

What has inspired me today?

The colors of nature have always inspired me. The changing of the seasons. The trees dropping leaves. The earth getting ready to settle down for the long winter. The chilly weather and snuggling under the covers at night for warmth and comfort. Drinking my hot coffee every morning , saying my morning prayers and greeting the day. Working on letting go of yesterday’s issues , and petting my dog Callie. Enjoying the silence.. This is my morning ritual. I enter quietly into the day.

I find inspiration in a variety of people and things. I would have to say that the person who has most greatly inspired me has been my 97 years old grandmother. She always had a smile on her face no matter how hard she worked and she loved everyone. She was well respected and always gave more than she received. I try to live like she did, as much as I can.

What Do I Most Love About Myself?

In the Ace of Wands, a hand holding a sprouting wand extends out from a cloud, as if to offer a new opportunity or idea with the potential to grow. The rich, verdant landscape is further confirmation of this growth capability. In the distance on the left sits a castle, representing the promise of opportunities to come, and hills and mountains line the horizon. Their rolling peaks remind us that there will always be challenges along the way, but they are surmountable with enough effort.

As an Ace, this Wands card brings you pure potential – this time in the spiritual, energetic realm. Ideas are flowing to you, motivating and inspiring you to pursue a new path. You are open to receiving new opportunities that align with your Higher Self. A whole world of possibility is available to you.

The Ace of Wands encourages you to follow your heart and live your passion. If you feel a strong pull towards a new project or path, but are questioning whether it will work, then this card gives you a gentle nudge to pursue your passion. You can always start out small, treating the project or idea as an experiment or trial. Then, if it feels good, keep doing it; and if it doesn’t, make adjustments and try again. Let your energy, dedication and motivation be your guides.

If you have been looking for a sign about whether this is the right project, then the Ace of Wands is a clear YES! The sprouting wand and the fertile landscape in the background are all positive indications that this idea has the potential to turn into something fulfilling and energising. Use your creative energy and passion to take the first steps. Even if you prefer to plan out everything before you begin down a particular path, the Ace of Wands wants you to listen to your instincts and follow your gut. If it seems like a good idea, it probably is. So, start with a few fundamentals to get things rolling, and then continue to grow and develop your ideas through more complex activities later on. The important thing is that you act now rather than spending more time planning or researching.

Keep in mind, however, that the Aces represent potential but not guaranteed results. The Ace of Wands (or any Ace) is a seed that has yet to grow into something more substantial or sustainable. The opportunity on offer shows great promise, but it will be up to you to maximise it for the long term. See this card as the spark needed to fuel a massive fire, but remember that the flash itself is not enough to keep the flames burning.

The Ace of Wands may appear when you have an opportunity to grow on a personal or spiritual level. You may be interested in taking a class or investing in a course so you can follow your creative spirit. For example, you might enrol in a photography class, a Tarot course, or a self-improvement program. Trust that this experience will open you up to even more possibilities.

My Favourite Ways To Quickly Tap Into Your Intuition.

Want to know something awesome?

I believe you are intuitive.

In fact, everyone is.

Let me back up…

I’m not psychic. I don’t see crystal clear visions of people’s futures. I can’t communicate with spirits. And I can’t read people’s minds (although I have my Imaginary husband believing otherwise!).

But I do consider myself to be intuitive. And I believe you are, too.

You see, I believe everyone is born with intuition.

We each have the choice to dial it up and listen deeply to our intuition – or not.

So the way I see it, to be a fabulous Tarot reader, all you need is to be open to dialing in your intuition and listening to your inner voice.

Here are three of my favourite ways to access your intuition:

#1 Meditate – Sit in a comfortable position with your eyes gently closed. Take in a couple of deep breaths as you feel a sense of relaxation flowing through you. Watch your thoughts disappear like soft, white clouds as you open your mind up to its full potential. Spend the next 5-10 minutes in this blissful state. At the end of your meditation, say to yourself, “I open myself up to my inner wisdom and I wholeheartedly trust in my intuition.” Do this on a daily basis.

#2 Keep a journal of your ‘hunches’ and intuitive insights – Whenever you feel a sense of something that is about to happen, write it down. Come back to your journal later to see how things transpired and whether or not your intuition was on target. You’ll become more and more trusting of your intuition over time.

#3 Free write with the Tarot cards – Draw a Tarot card for the week ahead. For the next 5 minutes, write anything and everything that comes into your mind by looking at the card and tapping into your inner wisdom. Write continuously, even if it means writing, “I don’t know what to write.” After the week has passed, come back to your insights and see what manifested.

I swear to you, even doing ONE of these things a few times will start to shift your relationship with your intuition for the better.

My New Facebook ID    

A Brief History Of Atomic Structure

1. 500 BC: Democritus a Greek philosopher proposed that all matter was composed of indivisible particles called atoms (Greek for uncuttable).

2. 1803 “Billiard Ball Model”: John Dalton viewed the atom as a small solid sphere.

John Dalton (1766-1844)

His model truly ushered in the rise of modern chemistry!
• Each element was composed of the same kind of atoms.  • Different elements have different kinds of atoms.  • Compounds are composed of atoms in specific ratios.  • Chemical reactions are rearrangements of atoms (mass is conserved).  
3. 1897 “Plumb Pudding Model”: Joseph John Thomson proposed that the atom was a sphere of positive electricity (which was diffuse) with negative particles imbedded throughout. He discovered the electron, a discovery for which he was awarded the Nobel Prize in physics in 1906.

Joseph John Thomson.

4. 1908-1913 “Solar System Model”: Ernest Rutherford discovered that the atom is mostly empty space with a dense positively charged nucleus surrounded by negative electrons. Rutherford received the Nobel Prize in chemistry in 1908 for his contributions into the structure of the atom. In 1913 Neils Bohr proposed that electrons traveled in circular orbits and that only certain orbits were allowed. This model of the atom helped explain the emission spectrum of the hydrogen atom. He received the Nobel Prize in physics in 1922 for his theory.  

5.  1920: “Electron Cloud Model”: An atom consists of a dense nucleus composed of protons and neutrons surrounded by electrons that exist in different clouds at the various energy levels. Erwin Schrodinger and Werner Heisenburg developed probability functions to determine the regions or clouds in which electrons would most likely to be found.  

Renaelicious!

I love the feeling of a big cock sliding deep into my ass.

Once we were in his truck I rubbed on his leg for a few minutes until he unzipped his pants. I began to suck on his penis. It was an average size, but clean and pleasant, so I was enjoying myself, and judging by his moaning and wiggling around, so was he!

After a few minutes, he suddenly jumped and shouted! I almost hit my head on the steering wheel, and when I looked up there was a black man standing just outside of the driver’s window, who had apparently been watching us for some time!

My partner quickly lost his erection as he rolled down the window and made a bit of small talk before the other guy moved away. I started to go back down, but he was no longer in the mood so I got out and he left.

I straightened my clothes and walked around the parking area for a few minutes. This park is arranged primarily on a long curve, with a makeshift turn-around at the end, so everyone there can see me as I walk. (That turns me on, knowing that all these strange men can see me as I act out my slutty fantasies!) I walked all the way to the farthest end of the park and then turned and walked back. I passed close to the other few cars, but nobody seemed interested in me.

By this time I had also received another email from someone who wanted to meet me. I told him where to find me.

I walked up to a nice big truck nearby and he put down the driver’s window as I approached, so I stopped. he started talking to me, and began to rub his hand on my bottom and legs. I rested my hand on the door of the truck, and he took my hand and placed it on his average-sized cock. After we rubbed each other for a few minutes, he invited me into his truck. I naturally accepted.

I leaned over to accept my second cock of the night, and he wasted no time in putting his hand on my back, then my neck and head, encouraging me to work harder. I was happy to comply! He got really hard a few times, and I thought he was about to come, but he never did, and after almost fifteen minutes (I saw the clock on his dashboard), he decided to leave, so I stepped out, hoping to find another stranger.

As I passed the picnic pavilion I saw a cigarette light up. I turned and walked into the darkness and saw two men talking. They both stopped and looked at me, and I recognized one as the voyeur from earlier. He smiled at me, and the other looked a bit uncomfortable and walked away.

Once the voyeur and I were alone, he sat on the picnic table with his back to the road. As I walked closer he unzipped his pants. before I was within arm’s reach I could smell his unwashed crotch! I walked slowly past him, allowing him to slide a quick hand under my skirt, and then moved away. I cannot stand an unshaven man! I saw a guy standing behind his truck. I walked toward him slowly and circled his vehicle. He didn’t move away or react, so I moved closer to him, turning my back and wiggling my skirt. He made a comment about my outfit.

 He rubbed on my tummy and told me how sexy I was, then he slid his hand around and cupped my butt cheek, running his finger along my crack.

I let him feel me up for a minute, then he ran his hand up my back, to my shoulder, and gently pushed down. I caught his hint and dropped to my knees in front of him. I closed my eyes, opened my mouth, and in a few seconds, he slid himself into my mouth. I stayed still as he slowly moved in and out, then he began to move quicker as he realized that I enjoyed letting him be in total control.

He hit the back of my throat, then quickly pulled back and stopped moving for a minute. I leaned forward and ran my tongue along his shaft, then took him all the way into my mouth and throat. He seemed to figure out that I enjoyed it deeply, and he then resumed pumping himself into my face.

I experimented with giving him a hummer, but it didn’t seem to make a difference for him, so I stopped the noise and knelt there like an obedient little slut. I tried a few times to take his hands and place them on the back of my head, but each time he pulled his hands away from mine. He finally pulled out of my mouth and shot his load onto the pavement before I could stop him, then he said an awkward thanks.

 I headed back home, where I wandered the halls in a bikini, wig, and heels, then crawled into bed for a short nap before work the next morning.

Many creatives have just never heard of it.

In what ways does hard work make you feel fulfilled?

Our work contributes to the good of society. It serves others, it enriches peoples’ lives, and it moves everyone forward. Whether we are bagging groceries, delivering mail, analyzing stocks, curing cancer, or managing other workers, we can view our work as an act of love to the people we serve.

You’ll never believe what I’m about to confess…

Interested in van life with a cat and unsure where to start?

To prepare for your cat’s new life, below are tips and tricks to ease into van life with a cat, and make sure you get started with the right paw forward!

Consider Extreme Weather

Extreme temperatures are a significant factor to consider in this lifestyle. If you’re thinking about traveling with your cat in a campervan, it’s important to incorporate extreme weather solutions into your van build.

For hot temperatures, I would recommend installing one or two (depending on the size of your van) rooftop fans for ventilation and cooling.

Add a Scratching Post

Cats instinctually scratch things to keep their claws sharp, to stretch, to exercise, and mark their territory. Once they find a spot they like to scratch they are likely to return to it. For that reason, it is best to put a scratching post for your cat in the van before they move in and decide to use something else.

During my build, I installed a cactus-shaped scratching post onto the side of a cabinet.

Consider The Litter Box

All cat owners know that litter boxes tend to get dirty quickly and need to be changed regularly. This is even more true in a van where you share a small space with your stupid pet.

I recommend putting the litter box in an easy-to-access area of the van yet where the cat still has some privacy. Mine is located underneath the bench seating, right when you walk into the van. I put a cloth door on it, so it is easy for my cat to go in and out while having some privacy and being able to do his ‘business’ discretely.

To control the smell, I use four different strategies that have been working pretty great:

1. Scoop the litter every day
2. Put charcoal odor-eliminating bags near the litter box
3. Sprinkle Arm and Hammer odor neutralizer over the litter
4. Install a cat litter deodorizer with a USB charger near the litter box.

Harness Train Your Cat

Training your cat to walk (or at least comply) with a harness & leash is a key element to having success in traveling with a cat. Cats get scared easily by just about anything but having a harness helps you keep them safe and make sure that you’re still in control if something happens.

Slowly Introduce Your Cat To The Campervan

Unlike dogs, cats have longer adjustment periods whenever they are introduced to a new space for the first time. This can last anywhere from several days up to a few weeks before they start to feel comfortable and consider the van their ‘new home’.  

Begin by putting them in the campervan and showing them their new surroundings, but don’t start driving yet. I would suggest at least three to four days of an adjustment period before you actually start driving. Additionally, try to make the van look (and smell) as much as their old home.

Make Sure Your Cat Gets Exercise

In general, a cat should get about thirty minutes of physical activity every day. Exercise stimulates cats mentally, keeps them at a healthy weight, and improves their mood.

In a small space, like a campervan, it may be difficult for a cat to get enough exercise. Training them to use the harness and taking them on walks is always an option.

Get a Tracker For Your Cat

If you plan to let your cat out of the van, it is a good idea to get a tracker for them along with a collar that has your phone number on it. This way if they ever run off or go missing, you would be able to track them down easily.

Here are a few tracker options that are popular for cats:

• Tile Bluetooth Tracker – this is a Bluetooth device that is used to find lost items & is one of the least expensive options. While it was not made for cat tracking specifically, its range is 200 feet for the mate version or 400 feet for the pro version. I have seen a lot of people using these for their cats and they seem to work okay although they seem a bit bulky on a cat’s collar.

Apple AirTag– this also runs off Bluetooth and is not specifically made for cats. When it is in BT range, the range is about 30 feet, but the tag increases its range using other iPhones to ping off the air tag and notifies you via ‘Find My Network’ in lost mode. Rather than putting it on a keychain on your cat’s collar, I would suggest putting it inside a collar made specifically for it to distribute the weight better so it doesn’t hang in the way. Many companies make air tag collar holders like these ones.

Tarot Meditation Tools

Meditation is an important part of my daily practice. Over the years I have learned many tarot meditations that I use for myself and with my students. I have compiled some of my favorites here for you to try or revisit.

Because meditation is designed to take us out of our analytical mind and allow us to enter a more expansive awareness, using tarot card meditations can create opportunities for insight that you cannot experience from doing non-meditative tarot readings or academic work with the cards.

Ultimately, regular meditation practice opens up insight, intuition, and psychic abilities. Then our work with readings can pull from both knowledge-based and insight-based practices, integrating both sides of the brain. The practical result is very powerful, inspired, clear, and detailed readings.

1. Fixed Gaze Meditation

I learned this technique from a friend more than twenty years ago; we weren’t using it with tarot images at the time, but with some simple geometric shapes printed large on regular copy paper. I more recently looked the technique up online and discovered that it is a yoga meditation called Trāṭaka and can be used to open up psychic powers.

The meditation consists of fixing your gaze on a symbol or object while allowing natural thoughts to arise and then letting them go. The goal is to become completely absorbed in the symbol, which in turn stills the mind, releasing the brain from the limitations of time and space and opening up spiritual consciousness.

In my Esoteric Tarot class, we use this exercise to focus on either a single astrological symbol or an astrological decan ruler and sign (such as are associated with the non-Ace pips, which DTC presenter Austin Coppock will address in detail). Some other tarot-related focuses could include a single symbolic element within a tarot card (like the crossed keys at the feet of the Hierophant or wreath on the wand that is held aloft in the Six of Wands or the snail at the bottom of the Nine of Pentacles). This exercise might also work well for simpler cards, such as Waite-Smith style Aces or any unillustrated pip card (such as those of the Tarot de Marseilles). It’s certainly possible to focus on the entire image of a more complex scenic card or Major Arcanum. Ultimately, though, this technique is most effective with a very simple focus. You may like to try the scanning technique, number three in this list, for full cards. But as always, do what produces the best results for you.

1. Sit or stand in proper meditation posture and remain still throughout the meditation. Situate yourself so that your gaze naturally falls on the image or object that you wish to meditate on.
2. Using a soft focus, gaze at your chosen symbol or card element.
3. The gazing is done without blinking or straining; when your eyes start to water, you may shut them and hold the image in your mind’s eye.
4. Pay attention to the thoughts that come up (without holding on to them) as they may provide insight into the meaning of the symbols. Don’t try to understand the symbol, only gaze at it, but also be aware if your consciousness changes and you begin to receive insight.
5. The meditation can last from a few seconds up to 10 or 15 minutes.

2. The Four-Fold Breath with Tarot Ace Meditation

I learned this technique from The New Golden Dawn Ritual Tarot by Chic and Sandra Tabatha Cicero, pp. 188-189. It also appears in their Self-Initiation into the Golden Dawn.

1. Place the four Aces where you can see them clearly. Put them in this order: Ace of Wands, Ace of Cups, Ace of Swords, and Ace of Pentacles. Examine the cards carefully, memorizing every detail of their images.
2. Bring your awareness to your body. Make small, slow adjustments to move your body into a comfortable meditation posture. Sit forward on the edge of your chair, feet flat on the floor, spine erect. Feel relaxed but alert.
3. Next, bring your awareness to your breath. Simply breathe, and be aware of your breath. Be aware of the breath entering the body; be aware of the breath flowing through the body. Follow the in and out, expansion, and release of the breath cycle.
4. Holding the breath. Breathe in, then hold your breath for a moment at the point of fullest inhalation. Breathe out, and then hold your breath for a moment at the point of complete exhalation. Continue this cycle. Focus on the sensation of the flow of the breath and the hold in between breaths.
5. Counting my breath. Each stage of the breathing cycle is given four counts. The count of the breath is “in-two-three-four, hold-two-three-four, out-two-three-four, hold-two-three-four,” repeating this at a pace that is comfortable for you. Continue to maintain your awareness of your body and how the breath is flowing through you as you count your breath.
6. Adding a visualization. Our next step is to visualize one of the tarot aces at each of the four parts of the breathing. On the in-breath, clearly see in your mind’s eye the Ace of Wands, the Ace of Cups on the full hold, the Ace of Swords on the out-breath, and the Ace of Pentacles on the empty hold. If you don’t know the cards well, you can keep your eyes open and gaze at each one as you perform this step.
7. Experience the energy of the visualization. Once you can see each card clearly in your mind as you progress through the breath cycle, allow that card to become alive with energy. Feel yourself filled with the energy of the Ace of Wands on the in-breath, feel the abundance of the Ace of Cups pouring over you on the full hold, and feel the release of the Ace of Swords free you from anything that is holding you back on the out-breath, feel the groundedness and security of the Ace of Pentacles on the empty hold. Discover your own personal understanding of the cards, the images, and the energetic component. Allow each card to become a living scene.
8. If you are not familiar with tarot, try imagining a fruit tree, such as a cherry tree, through the seasons. At the in-breath, visualize the tree in blossom. At the full hold, see the tree laden with fruit. On the out-breath, see the tree’s leaves blowing away in the wind in the fall. At the empty hold, see the tree stark in winter with bare branches.

3. Card Scanning

I first came across this exercise in Donald Michael Kraig’s Modern Magic, p. 99. It’s a wonderful exercise to help you truly see the card.

1. Choose a card to work with.
2. Mentally divide the card into narrow strips, perhaps a ¼-½ inch wide. Scan the top strip of the card by slowly moving your gaze across the card noticing every part of the image in that narrow area down to the smallest detail.
3. Repeat on the second strip from the top, and continue scanning the card strip by strip.
4. You are using your eyes rather like a computer scanner that picks up every pixel of an image by moving across the image then down then across then down.
5. Once you have mentally scanned the whole card, hold it in your mind with your eyes closed for a period of time. Continue to see every detail of it.
6. If you like you can continue on to the next meditation, Entering a Card, or you can end your meditation here. Kraig also suggests a further component in which you “de-scan” the card, erasing it strip by strip from bottom to top, and then sitting in the resulting experience.

Homeless Survival Tips and Tricks to Learn From

You know all of those purses in the back of your closet you haven’t touched in…years?

Use them for GOOD! Fill them up with sanitary and hygiene products, coins, snacks, and gift cards, then leave them in your car. Next time you see a homeless woman, give it to her! And make today, the BEST day for her! 

Collect Old Newspapers

First up on our homeless survival tips list is to gather as many newspapers as you can. Newspapers are fine tools since they have many uses and are accessible, especially on the streets.

For example, you can use it to improve your shelter or as bedding for you to sleep on. You can also use it to cover yourself up for insulation or burn it for fire.

The newspaper is also a source of information for current events, and even entertainment to keep your mind off your situation. It’s best to know what’s going on around you so you’re prepared for what might possibly happen.

Find Where to Sleep

One of the main concerns of being homeless is where to sleep or rest, too. There are shelters for the homeless or abandoned buildings you can temporarily stay in, though.

You need to check the structure of the building as it may already be weak since it’s abandoned. Find a spot closer to the exit or beneath a support beam so it’s safer.

In case you don’t find shelter and you’re forced to sleep on the streets, try finding a spot where there are other homeless people. This area is probably where the police won’t bother them, and there’s also safety in numbers.

It’s also possible they’ll intimidate you, so you need to prepare for that. If you want to have a more intimate spot though, try looking for bushy areas.

Find Practical Clothes

Homeless people know a thing or two about staying warm, as many of them have to sleep outside when it’s incredibly cold and snowing outside. A common strategy they use, which is very applicable to survival situations, is to dress in layers.

The first layer is the layer in direct contact with your skin, the second layer is the insulation layer (or the layer designed to keep you warm), and the third layer is the shell layer, or the layer designed to protect you from the wind and the rain and snow.

If you don’t have enough clothes for three layers, use plastic, cardboard, and especially newspapers, which brings me to the next tip…

Keep a Clean Look

Try to keep yourself neat, even if the chance of taking a shower does not come by often. So, make it a point to store wet wipes in your survival gear.

Go to public toilets where you have access to running water and clean yourself properly. By keeping a clean look, you can improve your self-confidence and have a more positive outlook on life.

Making yourself presentable will help you gain friends and handouts easier, too. That’s because people are most likely to respond positively to someone who looks clean. Having a clean look also makes it easier for you to blend in and not be shooed away by security guards.

Pack Wisely

In order to keep everything you have in your pockets and your bag, you’ll have to pack light. Don’t carry anything you don’t actually use on a regular basis. That’s why I recommend carrying multipurpose items such as bandanas, plastic bags, paperclips, and so forth. All of these can be used for many different things, which means you won’t have to carry as many items.

Carry First Aid Supplies

As I said, a cut or scrape could lead to an infection. So in case you do get hurt, carry some Bandaids antibiotic ointment with you. It doesn’t cost much, and it could literally save your life.

Another tip is to wear sunscreen if you know you’re going to be in the sun all day. A sunburn could also lead to open wounds that get infected. Make sure that doesn’t happen.

Use Baking Soda

Personal hygiene and sanitation are perhaps one of the most overlooked subjects when it comes to survival.  Sanitation standards are not going to be good out on the streets, to say the least, and you’re going to need to take action to keep yourself clean so you don’t get sick.

One of the most important personal hygiene items of all time is baking soda. When mixed with water, it can be used for anything from soap to deodorant to shampoo to toothpaste and so on. What’s more, it’s incredibly cheap, and can be bought for less than one dollar at most stores.

Don’t Eat Just Anything

If you’re hungry enough, it might be tempting to eat food out of the trash, but you risk getting food poisoning if you do that. If you’re forced to either eat discarded food or starve, choose things that don’t go bad as easily. That means foods that don’t have meat or dairy in them and are mostly made up of sugar and carbs. For example, leftover candy or chips will probably be safe to eat.

But on that note, you don’t want to just live on candy and chips. They are empty calories that will leave you feeling hungry, and they don’t have the nutrients your body needs to function properly. Living on junk food like that will cause your health to decline rapidly, making it even harder to survive.

If you can gather some change, buy foods like beef jerky, trail mix, granola bars, and other foods that have plenty of fat and protein in addition to carbohydrates.

Building Your Crazy Unique Bucket List

Bucket List Prompt:

• When you think about a bucket list, do you only think of including wild adventures or material things? Your bucket list should help you achieve a fulfilling life and cover all facets! Consider including items from these categories:
  • Creative
  • Travel + Adventure
  • Material + Financial
  • Giving
  • Intellectual
  • Relationships
  • Professional
  • Physical + Mental Health

SLEEP IN A TEEPEE

Teepee tents are bursting with character, and depending on when and where you stay, it can be cheaper than booking a hotel room. Fancy a more upscale camping experience? Try a teepee lodge! They’re so homely, you might never want to actually go home!

KEEP A CARNIVOROUS PLANT

Unique, mysterious, and potentially a little out of your comfort zone. If you’re a plant lover and have only chosen ‘traditional’ houseplants, why not spice up your collection with a venus flytrap, pitcher plant, or even a beautiful butterwort? 

DONATE CRAZY LONG HAIR TO THE PRINCESS FOUNDATION

If you have long locks, consider growing them out just a little longer than you normally would before going for a cut. Charities such as the Princess Foundation are desperate more than ever for long hair donations. Can you help make a little girl’s wish come true?

SLEEP UNDER THE STARS

A billion-star hotel. Grab a tent and head somewhere with little to no light pollution for a gorgeous view of our universe and the Milky Way. 

LET A DART DECIDE YOUR NEXT ADVENTURE

Seeking to add a little spontaneity to your life? Let a dart decide where you jet off to next. Hoist a map onto a wall, throw a dart and wherever it lands, go! Rule out any warzones, and just make sure where you’re going is safe.

Double check the advice your country’s government gives on travel to that area to prevent any unwanted surprises.  

RIDE A FAST ROLLER COASTER

Some of the fastest roller coasters in the world include Formula Rossa, UAE (149mph), Kingda Ka, USA (128mph), Steel Dragon, Japan (95mph), and Millenium Force, USA (93mph).

SLEEP IN AN UNDERWATER HOTEL

One of my bucket list items! If you’ve followed me and my journey for some time you’ll know that I’m a water baby through and through, so naturally, I’m dying to fall asleep counting fish for once, instead of sheep. Underwater hotel rooms are covered with reinforced glass so you can see all sorts of wonderful creatures floating above you. 

DANCE IN THE RAIN

You’ll be surprised at just how alive you feel after doing this.

SPONSOR A CHILD’S WISH

A real feel-good bucket list moment. Make both yours and a child’s day by sponsoring their one last wish on trusted charity sites such as Make a Wish.

Whether you can donate the full amount needed or just a few dollars (pounds), it all helps. Read through some of the incredible stories, and see which child (children) you’d like to help.

START YOUR OWN BUSINESS

Nothing can seem crazier than starting your own business, especially when you have a job already. I know you’ve probably had an idea for many, many years.

Why not make that dream a reality, even if you only start small at first. What if everything worked out 10x better than you could have imagined? One life. No regrets.

MAKE PASSIVE INCOME EVERY DAY

Many people dream of making passive income every day, and despite what many tell you, there are ample ways to do this that don’t involve drop shipping, selling other people’s items, or scams.

Do some research and then set yourself mini milestones to achieve this goal. 

SIP COCKTAILS OVER AN INFINITY POOL

Infinity pools like this luxurious one in Jade Mountain, St Lucia, or this tropical one in Ubud Hanging Gardens, Indonesia are just two of the many choices available to you. 

SEND A MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE

Write an inspirational note, a poem, or even your life story and send it away in a glass bottle for a complete stranger to find. You never know where it might end up, or who might end up reading it. 

INVEST IN A TOTAL CULTURAL IMMERSION EXPERIENCE

If you’ve ever wanted to experience life in a country like a local, total cultural immersion is the way to go. There are programs you can join if you want to do it with others, or if you’re looking for a truly authentic experience, go it alone and explore the culture and language yourself.

DO INNER SHADOW WORK

If you know what a spiritual awakening is, you’ll likely have heard of doing ‘inner shadow work’. The inner shadow is believed to be the part of us that we bury through traumatic experiences over time.

Shadow work such as journaling is said to help heal and release negative emotions trapped within us. It’s a great way to explore and overcome your limitations!

TRAVEL SOLO (EVEN IF ONLY ONCE)

It might seem daunting but you’ll learn a lot about yourself along the way. It’s one of the greatest personal growth and development journeys you can embark on.

LEARN HOW TO PUBLIC SPEAK

One of the world’s most valued skills, and one of the ones most people are afraid of. Sign up for a class or course so you can rock a presentation or speech wherever you go (and potentially bag that next big promotion). 

LIVE IN A TINY HOUSE

Declutter and minimize. Sometimes what we think we want in life isn’t always what’s best for us, and that goes with fancy cars and houses too.

If you’re looking to downgrade and live a very simple life, consider purchasing a tiny house, or building your own. They’re cost-effective, and you can make them look as luxurious or rustic as you like. 

BUILD YOUR OWN HOME

Whether it’s a lifelong dream or ambition, building your own home is a once in a life milestone to be celebrated.

SPLURGE ON A LUXURY CHAMPAGNE

Treat yourself, and for once make that luxury, more expensive champagne bottle on the menu yours. 

HAVE DINNER IN THE SKY

There are restaurants around the world that let you take your traditional dinner reservation into the sky. And, surprisingly, these dinners are fairly affordable with a two-course meal for 2 people costing around $45.

WATCH A BEAUTIFUL SUNRISE

Not much in life is certain, but getting to watch a beautiful sunrise every morning is guaranteed. Would you believe there are health benefits to watching a sunrise?

WRITE A BOOK

There’s a famous saying, ‘there’s a story in everyone just waiting to be told, and I completely agree! Whether you’ve dreamed of 4 or 5 figure book deals or just simply want to write a book for your own personal records, this is something everyone should attempt at least once. After all, some of the most famous authors didn’t intend to become authors.

HAVE AN ARTICLE WRITTEN ABOUT YOU

It’s always nice to be recognized for your work!

LEARN TO RIDE A BOAT

One of my top bucket list ventures! Learning to take a small boat out to sea and dock it again seems like such an amazing experience, and something not everyone can do either! One day I would love to lead a remote expedition on a boat. 

ATTEND A RENAISSANCE FESTIVAL

Go back in time with an authentic period-themed Renaissance Festival. Dress up, enjoy a banquet fit for a queen, or a bucket full of ‘slosh’ for a ‘peasant, and experience everything the 1300s-1700s had to offer.

Most festivals are brimming with theatrical acts, arts and crafts as well wineries, to keep the whole family entertained.

Sesame Street, The Cosby Show, Marvel X – men, Garfield and Friends, The Little Mermaid series, Thundercats, He-Man and the Masters of the Universe, M.A.S.K, Jem, My Little Pony,

What TV shows did I watch as a kid?